amazing? not really.

2012-02-05T21:17:00.001-08:00

My trash can is filled with empty juice boxes and my desk is covered in unfinished water bottles. I just noticed this now, and I find it to be hilarious. x)

I'm in an awful way.

2012-02-02T17:43:00.000-08:00

School's driving me crazy yo.

2012-01-23T17:58:00.000-08:00

TEMPLE HOPPIN'~~~~
Went to three temples lol. My lungs are burning from all the smoke, ears feelin' clogged from the firecrackers, and heart feelin unsteady from the loud drum beats. I love dragon dances so much. The drum beats are so powerful, that if you put your hand on your chest, it feels as if it were your heart that was beating. The dragons are super cool too! This one dragon kept bending down in front of my family and I. My little cousin Emily was having soo much fun lol. OH MY GOODNESS BABY MORGAN WAS SO PLAYFUL. she's usually real cranky, but yesterday, she gave me three kisses :3 I played temple run hehehe. Kayla freaking has a high score of 1,600,000! I forget what numbers go in place of the zeros, but yeah.
SOOOO MUCH FOOD MAN. Roasted pig (YUMMMM), three different fishes, two different soups, and plates and plates of veggies just for lunch. Then for dinner, clams, breaded shrimp, hainam chicken, beef loc lauc, glass noodles, chicken salad, shark fin soup, and them veggies. Sponge cakes for breakfast, then homemade pho for lunch, then jong for dinnner~~~ JOOOOONG, MMM SOOO GOOOD. Ima bring some for lunch. So excited. My fridge is packed man.
Rollin in the dough~
My hair smells like good luck :)

2012-01-21T20:26:00.001-08:00

i ain't digging the japanese version, but oh hot dang TOP♥

2012-01-15T15:12:00.000-08:00

chinese new year is the holiday that takes the most preparation from my family. today, we took everything out of my stepdad's room, lysol-ed everything, windex-es everything, vacuumed like crazy, and then put together my brother's new bed. Someone just got their own room. After that, we're going to put all of the furniture in my room to the middle, wipe down the walls, lysol it, windex it, vacuum it, then rearrange it. I'm excited and nervous. I SHOULD THROW A PARTY JUST SO YALL CAN SEE IT. I'm literally sweating from all the cleaning I've just done...sorry.

2012-01-05T21:54:00.000-08:00

I want lots and lots of money so that I can have a huge mattress specially made to fit in that little cove in my room. HOW FUUUUUUUN WOULD THAT BE?!?!?! which way would I sleep? what would I do with the extra space?? AHHHHHH PLEASE OH PLEASE SOMEONE MAKE THIS A REALITY. I could get those foldable screen thingies and section of my room in parts and it'd be like my own little apartment! Why am I getting excited. this will never happen -.- OH MY GOD. I could build my bed section to be unusually high and everyone would ask, "Why is your bed so high?" and I would say "dunno"
BUT I WOULD KNOW! I'D HAVE MY OWN LITTLE SECRET HIDE OUT BENEATH MY BED!!!!

hard to swoon

2012-01-05T21:34:00.000-08:00

Canada, eh?
The moment I get off the plane, EVEN BEFORE I GO THROUGH CUSTOMS, EVEN BEFORE I GET TO BAGGAGE CLAIM, the number of asians catch me off guard. I felt like I had to constantly talk to my mom obnoxiously loud so that people knew that we spoke english. IT WAS INSANE. SO MANY ASIANS GUYS. Japanese restaurants everywhere! but alas...no japanese souveniers to be bought T.T I practically walked all of Vancouver by myself in search of a good japanese store. Found a legit manga store...nothing in english. I WAS SO SAD.
Things I didn't experience in Canada: bacon, a real life maple leaf, bears, moose, or those guys in the red uniforms. Where was I guys?!? It was like some kind of culture lingo. Population was 50% asian, you pay with American bills and get Canadian coins back, no toilet seat covers anywhere, you have to pay extra for rice...IN ANY ASIAN RESTAURANT, and you gotta ask for straws because they don't just give em to you. I was amazed everywhere I went man.
I was walking down Robson and this korean dude kept shouting "YOJA YOJA NUNA NUNA YOJA YOJA" to his friend, and I was like "oh snap he got them gurl problems" SOOOOOO MANY ASIAN GIFT STORES. and you would think that with all of this asian merchandise being sold throughout the city, totoro stuff would be cheaper! but noooo.
Okay enough with the asian excitement.
This trip made me want to live in the city. Not for rest of my life, but just for a year or two. Just to experience it. Preferably Tokyo :3 I looooove riding transit trains. I loooove walking down streets feeling like I have a purpose even though I'm just wandering.
My mama sprung a "we'll see" once again. Dunno for sure if I can go to cue, dunno for sure if i can go to angie's.

And I want it, I want it, want it all. you.

2011-12-27T14:41:00.000-08:00

I've had enough. I'm tired of feeling like I'm supposed to be doing something and end up doing nothing. I'm aiming to change. I'm going to go to Canada and come back a different person. A bacon-loving person hehe.
And I agree with you Lena, everything is annoying.
I feel like I'm betraying myself when I try to make conversation with you. I just want to end it all.
THE TEMPER TRAP~

I'm going to meet you at midnight

2011-12-19T21:08:00.000-08:00

ohhhh shooooot, check out that homecoming prep. man, I am so sorry for cutting you my dear bangs. I was just soo bored lol.
FINALS...
breezing through~
not because they are easy, but because i'm not stressin. dunno why, but i like it :)

Clowns to the left of me, Jokers tot he right. Here I am, stuck in the middle with you.

2011-12-17T23:39:00.000-08:00

I think my mom is really proud of me. She has been very nice to me all day, and even though she left me downstairs by myself, she turned on the heater in my room without being asked... I should definitely be studying o.o I mean earlier, she was just telling me jokes and laughing to herself. Then, she was just staring at me as I got up threw away my pretzel wrapper and got a soy milk box. She was just staring at me guys. AND even though we're under the same roof, she called me and was talking all funky. Like a valley girl. I'm feeling kinda weird. My mama my mama.

Let me go on, black-eyed blister in the sun

2011-12-17T18:44:00.000-08:00

ehhhhh, am I going to study?

2011-12-06T20:46:00.001-08:00

LEEEEENNNNNNA YOU SHOULD WATCH: Me too, Flower!
first episode was really good.
i kinda don't like flower boy ramyun shop right now, i want her to end up with the pole lol.

2011-11-28T20:15:00.000-08:00

HEHEHEHE SAVED THE BEST FOR LAST ;)

Samantha Alcantara, thank you for understanding why I left you out on the list x) It's was so funny when you mentioned it to me lololol. Sigh, I miss going to your house, sleeping over, going to urban with you and practicing them body waves. I'm thankful that you're one of the people that I'll remember the good times with and I'm so so so very thankful for everything that you've done for me. Hmmm, maybe I should make yo a new SAMANTHA thing for your binder. hmmm, hmmm, hmmmm... Samantha, I don't know why but you seem very clean. Like whenever you open your wallet, everything is straight and in place. Iono why I thought of that lol. OH HEY. Thanks for being so nice to Gohki ;) I approve! I'm thankful for your funny face that never ceases to make me laugh, and crazy moves. You always find a way to incorporate dances into stuff. pretty pretty clever. okay so i'm like half asleep right now. i'm thankful for every part of you and you best be thankful for me giving up my sleepy time for you. also my u button is broken and i've been painstakingly working around it this whole time. just thought that you should know. uuuu da best~

She got no future, just a love to endure.

2011-11-25T11:00:00.000-08:00

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!
Hopefully you guys had a nice day with the yummy food :3
Eh, sorry for the typos and such. Hopefully my passages met your expectations.
I am thankful for everybody yo!

p.s. sorry I posted this late. I had it in my drafts, but i forgot to post it.

Aaron Kim, Thank you for helping me start up my baking business again x) I honestly would have never started it up again if you hadn't suggested it. But more than anything, thank you for having faith in me. I don't think I'll ever forget all that you've helped me with. My favorite thing about you is that you just seem really honest and loyal. I admire your courage to step up for what you think is right. Thanks for allowing me to meet someone like you.

Allison Lam, I'm so very thankful for just your existence! I'm even more thankful that we have a special bond that exceeds the cousin-to-cousin relationship. I don't how you do it, but you surprise me every time by saying things that I really need to hear. When I talk to you and you give me your feedback, everything seems to make sense. You have so much insight that I feel that you know more about me than I do myself. Someone like me, who tries to turn every problem into something far more dramatic and ends up getting hurt by their own thoughts, needs someone like you, a person that brings me back to me. You're like the ice-cold water that wakes me up from my false reality. This reason exceeds all the other reasons for why I'm thankful for you. Not only do you inspire me to become a better person, you affect my thoughts and my actions for the better.

Anoop Nijjar, thank you for just being there. This might be the same as your thanksgiving message from last year, and I might bring it up whenever we talk, but I really am truly thankful. You've done so much for me by just listening and lifting up my mood by being yourself. I'll never forget it. You saved me and for that, I'm forever in debt to you. Lol, this debt is probably the only debt that I'll be glad to pay. Thank you for everything. I sincerely hope that you're happy and you continue to be happy for the rest of your life. Road trip~

Arya Channaveeraiah, thanks for making me laugh. LOL AZIIIIZ! Don't like hugs Arya? Or maybe it's just Maliq hugs? ACADEC4LIFE. Thank you for all of those times that you've called me "the nicest person ever" too. I still don't think I've ever heard you cuss... LOL PARKOOOUR! *rolls around on the floor for no apparent reason* You're probably the only person that I can talk about Tribe Called Quest with. You on point Phife?

Candace Benson, Benson, Benson, Benson, Benson Burner. I think you're hilarious and beautiful. With these amazing traits, you have this air of confidence that infects me whenever I'm with you. Thanks for that :P I know that you think that you're insecure, but the fact that you can talk about your problems easily just amazes me. Sometimes I can't even find the words, and then I would doubt if I even feel that way, but you just seem so sure of yourself when you talk. Well except when... "sp- sp- spa- spaghetti?" LOL. Also, your room just made you 139754612 times more interesting. There's so many things to look at, and I realized that you are incredibly interesting yourself. It's like it'd take me a lifetime to fully know you for you, and I think that that's so wonderful. Thank you for being my friend and gracing me with your presence. LOL I JUST HAD TO SAY THAT LAST PART. sorry :3 Oh and p.s. I posted an anonymous comment on your tumblr awhile back. I made your day :3 teehee.

Chelsea Moreno, thank you for being my sista :P We're so alike, but we have our differences as well. I eat quickly, and you eat slowly. You find yourself incredibly awkward, but I find myself incredibly comfortable when I hang out with you. Your voice is so soft~ I feel like when you talk to me it's a secret, just for me and no one else. It makes me feel special lol. And oh my goodness, the things you say are freaking hilarious. Thank you for putting up with me and being my lunch buddy. I like you and your little bows. And I like that picture of Jimmy Fallon on your binder. Ah, thank you for being a really good friend. OPE I MEAN SISTA.
Prime time lunch buddy. OPE I MEAN SISTA. Invite me to your house. Let me play with your phone. Take me to a concert. Please sister.

EJ Aquino, thanks for not making our friendship awkward lol. When we were assigned our seats for Hines, I thought to myself "Is this about to get awkward? NOPE." And it really didn't lol. You crack jokes and I just troll. I'm glad that you're just as lost as I am in that class. That class -_______- Thank you for remembering the good times and not mentioning the bad. Becoming your friend has allowed me to see how much I've changed. I don't know if I changed for the better or for the worse yet.

Gohki Kobayashi, Kobayashi Gohki, Gohki-kun. Dang I wish that I was part Japanese... I don't know you too well, which is a really lame thing to say, but thank you for being so good to Samantha. I approve ;) You're practically a genius and you constantly surprise me with your little squeals and such. "whoa...was that gohki?" OH, I don't know what sam has been telling you, but I don't think you're weird. If I ever seem annoyed by you, just don't even take it to heart. It is seriously just my face. I cannot control it -.-

Jason Hong, thanks for making me feel intelligent. I don't know why, but when you call me smart I actually believe you. Thank you for helping me study and such too! Talking to you makes me want to try harder at academics. When I slack off, you somehow get me back up and running. You should be some kind of coach, but then all your studying would go to waste lol. LOL THANKS FOR BEING SO FUNNY TOO. swag.

Jason Kim, you have to being doing something different, because I've been laughing way too much when I'm with you. LOL THE HAIR THING. Thank you for making me laugh and thank you for all of the puddings that you buy me. It's really fun to mess with you and I can't believe that your brother's first impression of me was the umbrella party x) Thank you for being my car dj too :P Lol thank you for being so...what's the word? Well, you seem like you always have a plan and that's really reassuring lol. Thanks!

Jerom Berdijo, thank you for putting up with me when I mess with you. I honestly don't mean it fullheartedly, I just can't help myself lol. You just make me laugh by being yourself. You could take that as an insult, but just know that I think that's an amazing trait to have. Laughter is the best! Also, thank you for wearing your tribe called quest shirt :3 makes my day every time.

Jess Renteria, I'm thankful for the way that you make me feel. "oOoOOooo~ the way that he makes you feeeeel? ;P" Nah man, nah. It sounds real cheesy, but I can't really explain it well. It's kinda like when someone brings up a certain place during a conversation, and you feel like talking on and on about how you love that place and you begin to remember how happy you were there and the things that you used to do. You begin to feel excited and you can't seem to find the words. Well, that's how it feels to be around you. You're the place that I love. You're the place that makes me feel safe as if I were only living in that one memory where I was just completely happy. I feel like I should be at that place, just like how I feel that I should be with you. I really do love you. And, I don't know how you did it, but thanks. Sometimes, I would just stop everything and look at you. I'd stop paying attention to where I'm walking, what words that I'm supposed to be listening to, and I would just look at you. I'd be so taken aback too! Like, I'm looking at someone entirely new. It blows my mind how easily you came into my life and how difficult it would be if you left. I trust you 100%. You make me happy. Ah, I'm trying so hard to not make this so cheesy, but I honestly cannot help it. Wait, why am I even trying? Words, words, words, thoughts making me blush. Thank you for absolutely everything. Thnx

Joanne Balleras, thank you for still calling me your best friend even though I haven't been living up to that title at all. Every time we see each other it's like this huge reunion with the big hugs and I'm instantly reminded of what exactly you mean to me. I remember everything in that moment and I appreciate you so much. Thank you for changing me for the better. Thank you for being there for me when I needed someone. Thank you for understanding me for me. You're just an outstanding person and my life without you wouldn't even be my life at all. It would be like some other weirdo from some other reality. Like imagine me just hiding in the library. In a way, You saved me. Well, if we're going that deep, everyone has a part in the person that I am today, but you have one of the greater parts.

Jonel Celestino, thank you for being the friend that I could relate to about certain things. No one else watches Adventure Time, has bike problems, lives near me (and goes to our school), or has those little awkward moments that you relate to tumblr or blogger. Seeing as how we both read each others blogs and I occasionally visit your tumblr, we know what each other's talking about. Thank you for actually caring enough about me to read my posts and such. When our tires get fixed, biking adventures it is!

Kathleen Punsalan, thank you for being one of the major sources of my amusement. You are an amusement park. loljk. Steve Choi~ BROCCOLI. I have your handprint on my door man, I could take your fingerprints, transfer them onto a special glove, and frame you for murder. Thanks ;) No but really, thank you for being such an amazing person. I will never forget those times that you let me in your house when I had nowhere else to go. Even though you don't like letting people in your house, I was the exception for a couple times. Thanks man, I appreciate it. AHH, let's have a sleepover again and build forts. Oh my, cheese and crackers. When I go into your room, I feel like cutting up magazines and taping pictures of random things that have artistic value onto your walls. Thank you for sharing your lotion with me too. Oh my goodness, remember when my hands bled last year form its insane dryness? You saved me Kathleen. Thank you for trying to toughen me up. You're probably the only person that isn't afraid to be rough with me. I don't know if that's good or bad, maybe good. I am sorry that I ditched you for Chelsea. I just cannot leave Chelsea...THANKS FOR YOUR COOPERATION AND UNDERSTANDING.

Lena Flair, thank you for being so perfect. You do so many things and you never seem completely accomplished which is really admirable. You are probably my only asianasian friend, if you know what I mean. Thank you for the sketch book that you gave me for my birthday :) I drew in it a couple of times, and I just think that the idea is so clever. I realized that I am not good at drawing anime lol. Anime lines are so precise and stuff..I want to see your drawings! OH MY GOODNESS. THANK YOU FOR TAKING ME TO ANIME EXPO WITH YOU. I have been wanting to go for years and I'm so very grateful to you for taking me. If we do go this year, we foreal need to dress up. Something cool. It'd be really nice to dress up as characters from the same anime, but that makes thing ten times harder. Something unique, but easy to put together. I think you should be totoro! ahh that was so fun. Thank you thank you thank you!

Melanie Casupanan, thank you for all that you do for me and for everyone else. You really do a lot and sometimes I feel that you're taken for granted. Thank you for allowing us to hang out at your house so often, and thank you for that period of time when I hitched a ride to school with you. Thank you for being so funny too lol. You're like a little baby funny lol. I just noticed that it feels like we don't talk as much, but that's only because we talked a loooooot back then. Thank you for organizing everything we do and thank you for putting up with every obstacle that comes your way. I feel like without you, everything would just fall apart. CHAOS WOULD ENSUE. Also, I feel the most comfortable at your house out of our friend's. Just Dance parties, thai food take out, fourteen hash browns, LOL THE MELTING ICE CREAM, that time when we put the two couches together and slept, confession circles, man so many things goes on in your house and I'm thankful that I was able to have those memories.

Richard Huang, thank you for being so unique. You're like that one character that you always see in fiction, but never really see in real life. Lol, the way that you walk past me during lunch going "AHHHHHH..." with your eyes closed and all. Richard, if they're too spicy, then stop eating them. Thank you for those times that we walked after school together. Man, I need to start doing CSF. I'm also glad that you're in acadec with me, because you're super smart and you set the level of which I need to study and you're really funny as well. Thank you for the laughs ;P Hahahaha funny, richard.

Suzy Lee, thank you for eveeeeerything! Do you realize that I am with you the most everyday? Cruthers, passing period, passing period, Hines, lunch, ObeObe, Nath. That's a lot of Suz. I'm really really thankful that we have acadec together. I think that's one of the reasons why I don't dislike it as much as everyone else. To be honest, I had fun at the competition. The part where I felt antsy for homecoming was real bad though. Anyways, I love giving you rides everywhere, because I feel the most comfortable with you in the car. Let's go get boba suz! Ey, even though mel has her license and stuff, I still want to give you rides! Do not replace me T.T OH MY GOODNESS SUZ. roomies :3 I'm soooo excited. We do a lot of stuff together man... You're the best! You make me laugh then give me that weird look. You share your lunch with me. You lend me your pencils. You do a lot for me, thanks :)

Walter Niederer, thank you for being so honest. I feel like when you tell me things or compliment me, it's the truth. You're one of the people that I trust when they tell me things. You even tell me things that I don't want to hear, but nevertheless need too. Oh my goodness, thank you for giving us a ride to the beach! That was sooo fun. Next summer, everyone will be driving, and ahhhh so excited. I need to practice driving on the freeway.. Thanks Walter! I will treasure the picture you sent me during acadec 4eva~

2011-11-23T09:49:00.000-08:00

I HAVEN'T EVEN GOTTEN THE BOOK YET GUYS. HAVEN'T EVEN LOOKED AT THE STUDY GUIDE OUTLINE.

I can't go for that.

2011-11-21T20:27:00.000-08:00

I feel like I've been gone for days... All I've been doing is rolling around on my bed, rolling around on the floor, and laying on the couch. Watching anime, watching j-dramas, watching k-dramas, reading manga, reading books that I used to love, watching movies that have been hiding in my downstairs drawers, playing old computer games that I was obsessed with as a child, crocheting, marking pages in my bio book, watching eighties movies, watching psychological movies, and eating apples. My mind is all over the place and I feel kind of lost lol. I can't really explain it. I can't relax, but when I sleep, I don't want to wake up.
I want to learn how to draw pictures in the foam of coffee.
I have an idea of goodies to sell...
AH I PLANNED ON WASHING MY SHEETS TODAY. SIGH SLIPPED MY MIND. I purposefully ate cookies in bed too. MANNNN. hmmm...what would it be like sleeping downstairs? whoa...it feels like an adventure now that I think about it.
-----
LEEEEENNNNNNAAAAAA FLAIR.
here's a list:
ANIME: Fractale, Ouran Highschool Host Club (rewatching for like the kajillionth time :3), Black Butler, Zero No Tsukaima, Durarara!
K-DRAMA: Flower Boy Ramen Shop (Lee Ki Woo!), Coffee Prince
J-DRAMA: Nobuta Wo Produce, Yamato Nadeshiko Shichi Henge, Hana Kimi
MANGA: The Wallflower, still waiting for Sukitte Ii Na Yo (Mangafox has up to 18, but that's it -_____- huge cliffhanger man.), Kindaichi Detective Files
Oh have you watching Death Bell? It's a japanese movie, or korean I forget, seems interesting, but I'm afraid to watch it by myself lol. If you have seen it, can you tell me to what extent is the gore? hehe al gore.
make me a list too!
-----
ah, suz, coffee prince...their relationship is sooooo cute O.O their relationship is honestly the best I've ever seen.
ah, i wanna go jogging.
I realized that I must seem real mean. Like I don't control my facial expressions and earlier, I looked at my mom and she just got really defensive lol. Gotta learn how to smise!
my brother and i have a lot of the same habits. makes me laugh and embarrassed.

I'm going to start on my thanksgiving list! be sure to check back~

He's a real live wire.

2011-11-14T17:49:00.000-08:00

comfort foods:
-makeshift fried rice.
-mashed potatoes
-tart frozen yogurt

I cannot wait to cook for myself during college.

Legs like little spiders.

2011-11-10T18:21:00.000-08:00

Someone is definitely trying to sabotage me...
I have been eating soooo much this past week, it ain't even funny. I do not remember ever being full this week either -______- I just think to myself, "oh...if I eat any more, ima get a tummy ache. Guess I gotta stop"
Sigh, the life of the no-life.
No, but forrealsies, I literally ate four meals for dinner a couple days ago. First, I cooked myself some ramen, because I didn't really want to cook anything else lol. Then my mama decides to show up with some spring rolls! The nerve... Then after I finish the spring rolls, she busts out some bun me! "-.- really." Of course, after I finished the bun me, my stepdad comes through the garage door and just throws an uncooked steak on the counter. He straight up just threw it there and then left. Then like twenty minutes later, he cooked it and well, I ate it :3. SABOTAGE! I JUST KNOW IT. Surprisingly, I have not gained any weight. I'm just worried about my skin T.T Acne bombs gonna explode all over my face mannn.
MANGAMANGAMANGA
ANIMEANIMEANIME
MAKIN CHRISTMAS PRESENTS. LENA AND JESS! I GOT YOUR PRESENTS ON LOCK MAN. LENA YOU WILL LOVE YOURS :3
whoa...what is going on...I typed in pandora and i just let it play, not choosing a station at all, and it's literally playing the soundtrack of my life o.o I'm too scared to click the tab and check what station it is...I might undo the spell.
I have learned to have fun with my bangs! I thinks it's so funny to blow them upward lol.
SENIOOOOOOR TRIIIIPPPP PLEASE BE THE BEST TIME OF MY LIFE. IMA START WISHING NOW.
man, I ate so much today -________- I'm seriously considering the fact OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS SONG. WHAT IS THIS STATION?!?!?! sorry lol, the fact that I'm going through a growth spurt. Am I still allowed to have those? I honestly don't know... Where is all this food going in my body...

You makin my dreams come true, doodododooododo

2011-11-07T05:52:00.000-08:00

mangamangamangamangamangamangamangamanga
mangaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~
this entire weekend, i've been reading manga, watching anime, watching korean dramas, watching japanese movies, and doing absolutely nothing productive. I barely even got out of bed on saturday lol. I woke up this morning...and read some more manga o.o I might be late to school! My life has started to go downhill guys. I can't help it! It's so warm and cozy in my bed...
mangamangamangamangamangamangamangamanga
mangaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa~

2011-10-31T21:12:00.000-07:00

i need a haircut. i might wait till chinese new year, but i wanna cut it now. i want seven inches of my hair gone...

2011-10-27T19:39:00.000-07:00

Today was a good day :)
After school, I just went to the mall and walked around by myself. I checked out more books to study with and I got some pinkberry. Whenever I go there, I always say that it's my first time so that I can order step by step lol. I feel so intimidated ordering the toppings and the yogurt flavor all at once. So I'd make like it's my first time and look at all the toppings. "Can I try the chocolate yogurt?" "oooh...peanut butter?" "uhhh...I'll just have raspberries and mangoes.." That's the trick guys!
When I was walking around people just kept looking at me and it felt nice to not care that people were looking at me. Iono how to explain it. I felt confident I guess? Walking around the mall wearing a flower in your hair and a pink frilly dress is what it takes, I shrug.
The new Apple store is cool. It's really big. I was just staring at the ceiling for like thirty seconds. I was playing chess on the macbook pro until this worker asked me if i needed any help...then I left lol.
DRIVING IS SO FUN. MY LIFE HAS CHANGED.
Eh, I learned last week that if you don't express what you feel, nothing will change. Stupid how obvious it is, I know lol. I knew this, and yet I kept everything inside and I just built up bad feelings. I felt defeated, I guess. Well, I'm over it now :P IF YOU'RE READING THIS SUZ, PLEASE ACCEPT MY THANKS. You're the only one that asked if I was sad lol. I just noticed how much time we spend together ._.
Other than that, I've been really happy lately. I think it's because I resolved what I was confused about last week, or maybe it's because I wake up earlier now? Or maybe it's because homecoming's coming up? Or maybe it's because, well, i lost my train of thought. OH IT IS MOST DEFINITELY THA MANGA.
MANGAMANGAMANGAMANGAMANGA.
You know what? I kinda like being called mei, or may lol. My brother just called me mei, and I felt happy lol. meimei maymay, iono know why but I like it.

To make sure the two of us meet, I cast a spell.

2011-10-21T20:54:00.000-07:00

TODAY WAS VERY EVENTFUL :)
Tied With Rachel for the highest score on the Lang Terms review quiz~ I know this, because she practically shouted it across the room to me lol. Got four questions right on that seemingly impossible quiz in ObeObe. I felt really really proud of myself! But then I bombed the Acadec quiz next period LOL.
GOT ASKED TO HOMECOMING~~~`SO FUNNY LOL. Samaaaaantha...LOL. That sudoku puzzle was pretty sly of Jason. Suzy was just getting mad, which made me so confused lol. When all of the guys gave me the flowers, I instantly noticed how there were only seven. Meaning that I would have to find the eighth one! I look around and everyone was just laughing LOL. I was literally about to drop everything and go search for Jess. I thought it was a puzzle x) Then Jess came out...I was seriously so close to saying no when he asked me... but then I thought about it, and Jess is a pretty nice guy. I figured that I might as well give him a chance and get to know him more at homecoming. Who knows? He might be my future boyfriend. HEHE :)
AAAAAND, I GOT MY LICENSE IN THE MAIL!
It ain't thaaaaaat bad... My mouth is just open, my eyes just wide, and my hair just split, but it ain't hoooorrible...OH WELLS.
Lol, after school I just kept thinking up random things that I should buy so that I could drive around some more. I went to food 4 less, to pink berry, to the library, then walked around with the girls, then candace's, then back to the mall, then home, then thai diamond bbq. Tis a very eventful day indeed. Ope, I almost got raped today too o.o

cha-ching cha-ching, bla-bling bla-bling

2011-10-13T17:53:00.001-07:00

OUR NEW PET IS A GRASSHOPPER.
My brother and I go out and collect grass for it everyday. :3
What to name it, what to name it...

2011-10-11T20:11:00.001-07:00

Star Slinger ♥
Teams vs. Star Slinger ♥

I'm all you need, and you'll never want more.

2011-10-04T21:36:00.000-07:00

So here's what went down today.
After school, my mama picked my brother and i up to go to the DMV to take my behind the wheel test. Well I drove us there for a little last minute practice. Hehe. My stepdad drove there in his truck as well, because he lost his license and needed a new one lol. Well, his freaking brake lights were broken so when he was driving in front of me, I almost crashed because I didn't see that he was stopping. My mom was yelling and yelling at me. She wouldn't listen when I told her that his lights were broken and she kept blaming me for being nervous and not paying attention. "I don't know what the hell is wrong with you." I hate it when she yells at me while I'm driving. She gets me all panicky and I can't even concentrate. After she yells at me, I just kept making a bunch of mistakes. I told her to stop yelling at me and that I she was the one that was getting me nervous. "I wasn't yelling at you!" wow. I felt like crying, I was so freaking frustrated. I did not want to take my test at all. I honestly just wanted to go home at that point. But I followed through, because I knew that I'd get even more yelling if I even mentioned not taking my test. So, the DMV only has like three instructors testing and I had to wait thirty minutes for my turn lol. I was just sitting in the car trying to balance everything on top of the steering wheel, I was so bored guys. This time of waiting calmed me down though :) Then my instructor, an old asian guy, started to pre-test me. That pretest was the first time that I honked a car horn lol. My parents call him "the dirty old man", because the instructors are supposed to test in the order that we arrived in and this guy skipped people and just went straight to me. Asians stick together man. LOL, the doors were locked and my instructor was trying to get in and dumbo me fumbled while unlocking the door. "Are you locking me out?!" All the parents waiting for their kids were laughing at me lol. It's okay though, it lightened up the atmosphere a lot. My instructor was nice, we joked around a bit. Then I just drove. And I passed. With eight errors. EIGHT~~~~ I can't believe I got my license guys, I'm sooo happy. Forealsies, I was just dancing and skipping around in the DMV parking lot. The parents were laughing at me again lol. I should just stay there for tips man. My mama bought me celebratory boba too :3 All that's left now is getting insurance and registering my car, then I'm all set! :D

Thank you for choosing the magic carpet for all of your travel needs.

2011-10-02T14:49:00.000-07:00

I'm so excited! Everything starts now. Fall weather, homecoming, lollicakes, halloween movies, fake spider webs, candy, costumes, pumpkin pie, thanksgiving feasts, thanksgiving leftovers, oooohh hot chocolate, black friday, christmas shopping, christmas songs, christmas movies, christmas decorations, present wrapping, present giving, present receiving, christmas lights!, christmas feasts, christmas leftovers, apple cider, mini banana creme pies, fruit tarts, new year's eve, new year's, birthday parties, and finishing half of junior year.

Fools in a spiral round this town of steam.

2011-09-30T21:54:00.000-07:00

Put your iTunes on shuffle. Give me the first 6 songs that pop up.
Superfast Jellyfish-Gorillaz, A Fool's Only Tears-Big Bang, Underneath It All-No Doubt, The Leaders-GDragon, Rock Steady-No Doubt, Until The End of Time-Japillow(LOLOLOL WHAT ARE THE ODDS? I SWEAR, THIS IS A LEGIT SHUFFLE.)
Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.
At last the Dodo said, "Everybody has won, and all must have
What do you think about most?
To be absolutely completely 100% honest, Jess crosses my mind a lot. Punch me in the face, I don't care lol. It is the truth.
What does your latest text message from someone else say?
"JORDAN IS SO FUNNY"
What's your strangest talent?
I'm a really good cup stacker. Well at least, I used to be. Number one in fifth grade~
Girls.... (finish the sentence); Boys.... (finish the sentence)
Girls just wanna have fu-un. Boys...bad boys bad boys whatcha gonna do?
When is the last time you played the air guitar?
hands down, eighth grade. anoop would look so amused whenever I busted out my air pianos.
Do you have any strange phobias?
I always feel like someone's watching me, even though I know that I'm completely alone. I always feel like people can read my mind too. I'm really paranoid.
What was the last lie you told?
I said that I was going to eat ramen, but I ended up eating a sandwich.
Do you believe in karma?
YES.
What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?
Weakness: I have trouble expressing myself. People misread my facial expressions and they misunderstand my comments. It gets me mad sometimes, because when people get the wrong idea about me, I can't even explain myself because that idea is already in their head so what's the point? Whenever someone says something wrong about me or comments about the things I say, I just get really really sad, because there really is no use in trying to change their mind. I'm also quiet and when I talk, I accidentally mumble.
Strength: I love how my thoughts wander. I think about so many different things and it really amuses me. The person I talk to the most is my mom (LAME) and whenever she's around, I just can't stop talking. I talk and I talk about everything, even though she doesn't even listen. She'd be talking to someone else, cooking, or watching tv, and I'd just be talking to her. She thinks I'm crazy lol. This isn't even a strength. I don't consider myself strong at all...Anne Frank.
Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?
I prefer talking on the phone over any form of distant communication.
Are you happy with the person you've become?
Not really, but wishing implies the want to have things to be different than the way they are, and I'm happy with where I'm at.
What's your biggest "what if"?
What if's are my life. I cannot choose...
Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.
Styrofoam cup. Panda Wallet
Most attractive singer of your opposite gender?
At this exact moment, Sameer Gadhia. Just watch Young the Giant-My Body live, oh my gooooodness.
Do you believe in luck?
Do I believe in Jess?
Do you have any nicknames?
meimei, megmeg, megen-ah
What's the worst injury you've ever had?
Sunburns are the worst -.- You would think I would answer my burn, but I thought the healing process was really interesting.
Do you believe in magic?
in a young girl's heart.
In a relationship?
I wish. Unofficially official, but basically yeah.
How many relationships have you had?
Three, including this one. But the first one was a joke lol.
What were you doing last night at 12 AM?
SLEEPIN LIKE A ROCK.
Are you the kind of friend you would want to have as a friend?
lol not at all. I'm so thankful for the friends that I have right now.
In your opinion, what makes a great relationship?
Perseverence
How can I win your heart?
Who are you?
Give me the first thing that comes to mind when you hear the word: heart.
Samantha and Leo. I think it was Leo...
If you could press a button and make anyone in the world instantaneously explode, who would it be?
Peter Griffin. Everyone would be watching an episode of Family Guy and he'd just explode. That's aaaaall me. Then the show would just continue on to the next scene lol.
One night you wake up because you heard a noise. You turn on the light to find that you are surrounded by MUMMIES. The mummies aren't really doing anything, they're just standing around your bed. What do you do?
Hide under the covers. Nothing can get you there.
You accidentally eat some radioactive vegetables. They were good, and what's even cooler is that they endow you with the super-power of your choice! What is that power?
Innate capability
You can re-live any point of time in your life. The time-span can only be a half-hour, though. What half-hour of your past would you like to experience again?
New Year's Eve. Maybe if you spent the night at my house, thing's could have been different.
You just got a free plane ticket to anywhere. You have to depart right now. Where are you gonna go?
Tokyo
Do you have any relatives in jail?
yeah

I wish this table were made out of pasta...

2011-09-27T19:44:00.000-07:00

I just discovered Adam's weakness. Alfredo Pasta. He was kinda hesitant to try it, but once he did, he could "not stop eating it". Y'all know how my brother can't sit still to eat dinner. He takes a bite and then goes off and jumps around in the living room. But with this alfredo...he stopped playing wii, sat down, and has been eating for the past ten minutes. I didn't even notice until I realized how quiet it got lol. He's almost done and he says he wants another bowl...he just told me that he wishes this table was made out of pasta so he could eat it...what is going on...

Is it the look in your eyes?

2011-09-27T17:56:00.001-07:00

gosh dang this made me cry. soooo amazing!

and we go back to where we moved out to the places, heart it races.

2011-09-25T22:43:00.000-07:00

My little brother just turned six :3
But to be honest, his birthday sucked. My parents were barely home and they gave him false promises. I was the one to buy the birthday cake and I was by his side the majority of the day. I'm not trying to reprimand my parents, but I just wish that they didn't have to work so hard. I just wish it was easier you know? Well, I don't know how he stayed smiling and happy, but that's my brother for you. I worry about how he'll look back on his sixth birthday when he's older. I hope he won't be bitter. Ahhh when he came downstairs and saw his birthday cake, he looked so incredibly happy. He is just so adorable. I honestly can't imagine living without him. I was just watching him blow out his candles while trying to remember him as a baby. Lol, he was chubby and giggly♥ It was at that moment that I realized that without Adam, my family would have fallen apart. My parents fight so often and the only reason why they keep it to a minimum and hold back their heated words is their fear of Adam overhearing. And Adam has made our family so much more stronger. When Adam was born he was in the hospital for about six months. It was a really difficult time, and we rarely ever spent time at home, nevertheless together. I guess it was then that Adam himself became the sense of home that the three of us needed. So all in all, I may nag, I may bully, I may lecture, I may compete, I may mess with him, and I may troll, but I love him with all of my heart and I'm so very thankful for him. He honestly is everything.

think about it baby,

2011-09-22T22:21:00.001-07:00

And we're slow to acknowledge the knots in our laces, heart it races.

2011-09-18T18:04:00.000-07:00

25 Post a picture from the last time you went out to a social event.
26 Take a picture of your bedroom and post it.
27 Post your current Facebook profile picture.
28 List 10 turn ons in the opposite sex. Besides the obvious (attractive, trust, honesty, etc.)
29 List your top ten favourite fictional characters/
30 Share your zodiac sign and how you think it fits your personality

I'M JUST GONNA FINISH THIS NOW.

25. DAT HOMECOMING ISH.

26. too lazy my homie.

27. i just...logged out. well, if you're reading my blog then you're close enough to be my facebook friend lol.

28. TEN TURN ON'S: 1. Laugh. 2. That smirky smile. I don't know how to explain it, I guess it might be a crooked smile, but I never really understood what that was lol. 3. Hair. 4. Protectiveness. 5. Musicians. coming from a fanatic, guys in a band ♥ 6. Spontaneity. 7. Heroes. Courage. 8. Button ups. 9. Gentlemen. 10. That sort of connection you get when you like the same things they like, when they understand you when you talk deeply and/or randomly, and when they're speaking your thoughts right out of your mind.

29. I honestly don't know. The list that I'd come up with would just be the ten first fictional characters to pop in my mind. So, yeah :P

30. "This is one of the most emotional of all signs but at the same time one of the most protective of those they love. When a cancer allows you to become close personally with them, you will meet one of the most kind and caring people of the Zodiac. Make them mad and you will meet one of the most sensitive and formidable.
Shrewd and cautious, they go through life testing the waters. They have a vivid and strong imagination, which needs to be carefully governed. Otherwise they may find too much to worry about because a worrier Cancer is. People of this sign get very high marks in the intuition department. And when allowed to work instinctively, the Cancer mind is at it’s best. Brave in the face of adversity, this tenacious sign will sift through life’s problems.
Moodiness is one of the worst of their faults. They are quick to be in an up mood but just as quickly they are in a black hole. Keeping them moderated is the ideal situation for a Cancer personality. And along with their changeable personalities Cancers can also be shy.
Cancerians make wonderful life partners. Although they are very emotional, they are very caring and when in love are really in love. A problem in this little love nest though is that Cancers sometimes tend to be cruel with their words. When their lover uses the same words back at the Cancer, they truly take it to heart and don’t like the situation at all.
Sentimentality runs deep in the Cancerian. If you want someone to find the best card or gift for another, ask a Cancer personality. They are very inventive in their gifts and the receivers of such will tell you just how good they are. This romanticism is part of the Cancer aura but may keep a Cancerian living in the past instead of moving forward. Cancerians adore their children. Home and family is vital to the Cancer personality. If this water sign is not careful, they can smother the ones they love with their protectiveness."

-Pretty crazy and pretty lame, but this has a lot of truth in it.
Eh, I should be doing homework instead of talking about myself :P

The innocence of what you are is what I want.

2011-09-09T21:58:00.000-07:00

Heh, that be me in my glasses with my doodoo mama hair all did.
Eh, these days have been alright. Been told that I'm loved, had my name announced on the bulletin, became ASB senator, no big deal.
HA! JUST KIDDING. VERY BIG DEAL.
This week has been bittersweet in a way. I got yelled at by Mr. Cruthers...but it was literally a joke. He's too nice to be mad at me for studying that Krebs. Emshoff discussions are very interesting. I love every moment of it, because even though I don't say anything, I love listening to other people voice their opinions. I think I know what I want to be when I grow up :D But it doesn't pay much...OH WELLS. Failed my Bio pre-test and did just as bad on the actual test. Mr. Wagner laughed at me, hehe. Hines is back. That class man...sigh. Failing Pre-Calc, it's whatevs. AAAAACCCCAAAAAADDDDEEEEEEECCCCCC. I hope I make the team. If I don't, then everything I put into that class will be for nothing. On the upside: I still have them A's, my hoodie design got chosen, had the best day yesterday (YOU make me smile), my little babies texted me, my mom got reconnected with her best friend from high school, lost five pounds out of nowhere, Ally's going to stay over my house for her homecoming, got to hang out with Joanne over the weekend, ate some pico de gallo, my mama bought yummy apples sauce, my car's nifty...life's good ;)
I'M EXCITED I'M EXCITED I'M EXCITED.
gonna get stuff done this weekend guys. i got a whole schedule ready and everything.
driving~~~
LOL I typed this^ like four hours ago...what made me get off I do not remember. I just know that my arms are sore from washing my car. DANG GUYS, MY CAR IS CLEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAN! Wax on wax off status. I even cleaned the interior and all those little pockets and such. I even cleaned the seatbelts O.O Eh, no one wants to refill my tank T.T It's literally below E right now and the light still hasn't come on. "We'll fill it up when the light comes on" -________- it ain't gonna come on guys, I'm going to be stuck in the middle of traffic like a loser.

KAY DO THAT SHOWER NOW, THEN DO THAT ACADEC, THEN WATCH THAT TV, THEN SLEEP THAT SLEEP.
Mr. Sandman, bring me a dream~
man I've been listening to fifties music way too much...

Would you go along with someone like me?

2011-09-04T21:36:00.001-07:00

PANDORA - FOSTER THE PEOPLE.

I miiiiight, go to my first concert guise :3

TO DIE BY YOUR SIDE IS SUCH A HEAVENLY WAY TO DIE~~

2011-08-27T11:35:00.000-07:00

I'M SO SO SO SO SO HAPPY RIGHT NOW! AAAAAAAHHH, I'M GOING CRAZY AND BOUNCING AROUND MY ROOM. HOW. HOW. HOW.

Got shackles on my words are tied.

2011-08-23T17:57:00.000-07:00

MY LIFE THESE PAST DAYS IN SNAZZY BULLET POINTS:

★All I need is time. I need more time to absorb all these lessons, I need more time to study, I need more time to think about my future, I just need mooooore time yo! I feel like one day I'll mess up and use like my science knowledge in a spanish test or something crazy like that lol. My brain is really anxious for this school year. The reason why I chose Acadec as an elective was because I wanted to learn more about everything. We go into depth a lot in that class and sometimes Mr. Nath would go on a tangent and we'd learn something entirely new and different. I love it when teachers do that, because it's something that they brought up on their own, you know? They talk without lesson plans and they actually express their own opinions. Iono how to explain it lol.

♪Iu-Good Day cover by cutiepiemeg918 just makes me happy d(*⌒▽⌒*)b I've really been into r&b too...

ASIAN EMOTICONS? YUUUS. ヽ(´ー｀)ﾉ

☃ IT IS TOO HOT TO LIVE. (╬ ಠ益ಠ)

☀ I'm so excited for this school year, like no joke, ♪┏(・o･)┛♪┗ ( ･o･) ┓♪. No but fo realz, I can get my license in a month (if I pass...) my life's going to be amazing!

☻ I'm really flattered (´･ω･`)

☠ Is this all we are? It will get better. At least, I hope it does.（つ Д ｀）

I'M IN MY DREEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAM. why do I replay this song over and over again (ΘεΘ;)
Okay, bullet points and fob faces aside, I'm really happy guys :) I did well on the Heart of Darkness test~ DANG, I REALLY HOPE I MAKE THE TEAM. and back to studying....

Try a little tenderness, that's all you gotta do.

2011-08-13T18:53:00.000-07:00

OH. MY. GOODNESS. I WANT THIS BABY. BEBES~

Raise up to your ability.

2011-08-13T16:14:00.000-07:00

24 Post a picture of you and the person you were in a relationship with for the longest.

I remember taking other pictures with EJ, but I seriously cannot find any T.T EJ, we were off and on a lot, so I can't really say how long we dated with full confidence.
OH HEY GUYS.

Oh, white nights.

2011-08-12T21:50:00.000-07:00

23 Talk about your opinion on health/body image and what you do to stay healthy.

To be honest, I never really cared about anything except my feet. My family...we're very open yet close. Everyone voices their opinions freely without caring if it hurts others, but we would never talk about ourselves personally you know? We're not a really serious bunch. So comments on how we look are just thrown out there without any care. Ally was always made fun of for being dark, Kayla was always called "Gordita", and I was always made fun of for having big feet. The only time I felt fat in front of my family was when my aunt told me that I looked like I lost weight. I don't know why, but I just felt fat lol. After that went away, I never really cared about what I looked like. I never thought of myself as beautiful, ugly, fat, skinny, nothing. I just thought I was just there and that I was me. Then in eighth grade, people started complimenting me, which surprised me like crazy. Sam used to call me pretty all the time and I would believe that EJ thought I was pretty as well lol. That's when I started looking at myself, criticizing myself, and wanting to better myself. What I saw in the mirror then wasn't pretty. It honestly seemed like a joke. It's like, these people think I'm so pretty, why let them down? Then I started to dress better, do my hair, and all that jazz. I'm actually glad my mom won't let me wear make up, because I feel like once I start, I won't be able to stop. I'll lose more of who I am to the person I want be seen as. Back then, I was just plain old me, and now I feel like I have to make myself impressing. I don't know why or for whom, but I just have to. I guess you would call it vanity? And about being fit...I didn't care at all before this year. I honestly didn't. I felt that my weight didn't matter to me and the people that were going to be bothered by it didn't either. I ate what I wanted, when I wanted. I had the essence of confidence in me. Then this year, it might just be my maturity sinking in or maybe Jess's influence, but I care now. Gaining weight has become soooo depressing. Eating healthy? No problem, I love fruits and veggies. But now when I eat dessert or get a second serving of dinner, I feel so gross and guilty. It's very weird. I've also gotten more active. LOL WELL MORE ACTIVE COMPARED TO THE LAZY BUTT THAT I WAS BEFORE. Dude, no joke, I was a speed demon in fifth grade. I was all over the play ground playing tether ball and handball in third grade too. But then it all went downhill from there, and now, it's going uphill! hehehe...uphill because I hike. The feeling after doing a good hike...ahhhh it's amazing. Like you can conquer the world! Oh, now I crave a smoothie. I also jogged a little for a period of time lol. Hmm...eating healthy is all I gotta say. LOTSA WATA TOO. I don't even think I addressed the prompt correctly lol, oh wells. I SUCK AT IMPROMPTUS.

school's aight. GONNA ACE.

With magic soakin' my spine, can you read my mind?

2011-08-09T17:29:00.000-07:00

22 List your ten favorite foods.

-caramel
-sour gummies (i.e. sour patch kids, trollies, rings, straws, blahblah~)
-smoothies
-VIETNAMESE. PORK CHOPS, SPRING ROLLS, SODA CHANH, BUN ME, BUN THIT NUONG, BEEF LUC LAC, PHO.
-THAAAAAAAAAIIII FOOOOOOOD♥ OH NOOOOO, I AM CRAVING NOW. Thai Tea Boba everyday once I get my license!
-DIM SUM IS SO YUM YUM.
-fruuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuiiiiit! I could live the rest of my days with just fruit to eat. Ah bliss.
-salad. It's just so delicious and fresh :3 tomatoes...cucumbers...italian dressing...ah this prompt is torture.
-fried frog legs O.O don't judge me!
-dessert. as long as it's not too sweet. delicious crust are an excellent bonus as well :3

OH DANG YO. OH HOT MAMA. THIS YEAR IS THE YEAR. I CAN JUST FEEL IT.
I've never felt so pumped for a school year like I am right now. I've always sorta just went with the flow lol. I mean, I was always excited to see my friends and see who my teachers were and whatnot, but I'm legit excited to learn, study, and just go to school. Emshoff is cool. SSR=STUDY HALL WOOTWOOT. Newman is...I don't wanna say scary...well she's intense. I just know that she'll impact my life. She's intense in the sense that she will push you to your limits. get less than a 70% on a test? she'll come to school early or stay late to tutor you, and it's mandatory lol. I have this really good feeling about this year. I AM SO PUMPED FOR ACADEC. I WANT IT. Oh my...STAND too? OH MYYYYYYYY. I'M GOING TO EXPLODE FROM HAPPINESS. *fast forward a month or two* "WHAT THE HECK WAS I THINKING?!?!"

I have to write a letter about how I felt about what happened to me, because he feels guilty. I don't know what to write, I don't know how to structure it, I don't know how to explain something that I still can't even comprehend myself. Sometimes I wish I had a psychiatrist. Someone I could talk to without fear of judgement and betrayal. They'd give me unbiased opinions and they wouldn't be emotionally attached. I'd spill my heart out to them, to be honest. I think I just want someone that knows what they're doing to sort out all my stuff, because I don't wanna lol. This is probably just the headache talking .

The stars are blazing like rebel diamonds cut out of the sun when you read my mind.

2011-08-05T10:40:00.000-07:00

21 Pile all your favourite clothing items on your bed/floor and take a picture. Post it.

It's the hope of my thoughts that I travel upon

2011-08-04T10:59:00.000-07:00

20 Post pictures of you on your last three birthdays

16.

15.

14.

2011-08-03T18:45:00.000-07:00

19 Talk about an obsession of yours

TOP♥
BIG BANG♥
ohmygoooooooooodness. I was crazy obsessed with Big Bang. I watched all of their music videos, all of their making of the music videos, all of their cf's, all of their live performances, all of the reality tv shows they were on (when TOP said that infinity was his ideal age limit for dating, I went crazy. He's eight years older than me guys. EIGHT.) just about everything they were involved in, I was all over. I knew their height, their birthdays, their favorite foods, and whatnot. I WAS OBSESSED. And TOP...ohmy. I can't even...He's my top celebrity crush, like forealsies. G-DRAGON TOO OMG. When his solo album came out, I practically fell in love with him! I can't even put into words my obsession. Just go into my archives and there should be buttloads of posts about Big Bang. TOOOOOOOOOP~

NOW I'M GONNA BE WATCHING BIG BANG VIDEOS ALL NIGHT. REMINISCING.

2011-08-02T15:40:00.001-07:00

MY BABIES. MY LIJINKIES. AREN'T THEY ADORABLE? :D
Lol, no one was ready for this picture. Except for Alyssa and Taylor x) Hmmm, today went really well! I felt that I tried too hard and that I was really awkward, but when three of my kids texted me and told me that they had a great time...I felt so happy inside! "I was really nervous n scared but yyr group was fun :]] "JESUS!":D" LOL jesus...you guys wouldn't understand ;) AHHHH, link crew and STAND has got me pumped for this school year. This year I'm going all out guys! I'm going try to loosen up and just enjoy life. :)

And disappear into different directions alone.

2011-07-31T00:52:00.000-07:00

JUST WATCHED HARRY POTTER~ 3D, DBOX, intensity level = 93875647608426.
Then we ate at CPK at like ten pm, I'm freaking stuffed maaaan. That suffle was good though ;)
HMMMMMM, my schedule? It's alright. I'm just telling you this right now, my schedule might be totally different because of my request to change to AP CHEM. Whatta death wish. I'm so indecisive guys, it's insane. But Jonel just kept asking me, "Well what do YOU want to do?" and stuff like that, and that actually helped me a lot lol. I considered everything that I want to accomplish in my life, and I chose the harder route. I can push myself, I know I can. So thanks Jonel :D
Link crew? To be honest, I'm really nervous. I just hope my group is nice and forgiving. BLEH, I WOULD BE GROUP 13. If I were group 8, I'd have waaay more confidence. That's just how I do. Theme? I was going to bum off my cousin's fiesta stuff from last year, but I just saw that Casey and Taras were going to do that :/ OH WELLS. I ain't aiming for the most creative award like Jason. LOL "MY FAVORITE CHILDHOOD TOY WAS MY SAT BOOK." Then Ally told me that I should do pac-man with all these cheap supplies, but then I saw this ooother girl had that idea too. T.T s'okay though! Thing's will be fine. Just gotta practice and learn how to break the barrier.
wow...I could have sworn that my tv remote was right next to me. I look up and it's on my desk.
I'M TRIPPING OUT RIGHT NOW GUYS.

2011-07-27T17:54:00.000-07:00

LOLOLOLOLOLOLHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHALOLOLOLOLOHALOHAOOLOHAHAOLOLO
I AM DYING. I CANNOT BREATHE. MELMEL YOU'RE HILARIOUS. THOSE SECRET WORDS IN MY ROOM, YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT ;), WELL THEY ARE TRUE!

YOU! GO TO MEL'S BLOG AND CLICK ON ARCHIVES. THEN CLICK ON THE FIRST COUPLE MONTHS AND JUST READ ABOUT HOW MUCH MELANIE LOVES ME. JUST DO IT!

I'M A TUFF TUTTIN' BABY, I CAN PUNCH ALL YOUR BUNS.

2011-07-27T15:49:00.000-07:00

1. the person i like and why i like them.
Sigh, you guys already know -.-
JESS RENTERIA. I love the way he feels about me, it makes me feel cared for and important. It's a comfortable relationship and with him, it's like my faults aren't even faults anymore. It's kinda weird. I like his silliness, his witty comments, his cute charm, his smile, his funny scream, his opinions, his stories, his friends, his family, his glasses, his crazy faces, his laugh, and I love the way he makes me feel. He has this crazy way of making me feel amazing without even going to great lengths. Just hearing him talk or laughing at him makes me feel so happy. Sometimes I can't even handle it.

2. a famous person i’ve been compared to.
Sam compared me to Zooey Deschanel, but only to the character she played in 500 Days Of Summer. This guy nicknamed me Wendy Wu -.- And Mel and Michelle A. thinks that I look and act like communitychannel. That right there is really flattering.

3. 5 things that irritate me about the same sex/opposite sex.
-"PEOPLE WHO JUST ASSUME SHIZ" definitely.
-girls that make their image all promiscuous, then get mad when guys don't treat them like a lady.
-guys that take advantage of girls, regardless of who they are or what they look like.
-people who just don't care.
-shallow people.

4. the best thing that has happened to me this week.
hmm...nothing really exciting has happened to me this past week :/ I guesss it's gotta be playing with Heffalump :3

5. weird things i do when i’m alone.
Pump up the music, sing like crazy, dance walk, talk to myself, play my sp while hanging upside down, sit on my counter and eat a huge bowl of cereal, stand on top of all my tables/couches/chairs/counters/anythingthatyoucanstandon and see if I can touch the ceiling, try to redecorate my room, get all dressed up then fall asleep.

6. how i’d spend ten thousand bucks.
I'd save eight thousand, and spend the rest on whatevs. Give some to my mom, some to my grandparents, and indulge myself in goodies.

7. things i like and things i don’t like about the way i look.
For everything that I dislike about myself, I'll try to match it with something that I like. It's just a test for myself. I hate how my thighs are longer than my calves (calves? iono.) I like how long my legs are overall. I hate my bug bite/acne scars. I love my motorcycle burn scar. I hate my feet. I love my hands. My arms are awkwardly long. My skin is nice and smooth. I dislike my cheeks (ALL OF THEM). I like my nose. I hate my teardrop pudge. I love my waist. My lips are really small (it's kinda funny to me). I love my hair. I wish I could curl my tongue. I'm lucky that my teeth are straight. I hate my knees. I love my collarbone. That is all.

8. my last night out in detail.
Last night I biked to Ally's and together we biked around for a bit. It got dark and the air was amazing. She told me about all these musicals she's been watching, her guy problems, and what she's been planning for her future. Last night I had to help her and give her advice, which was different, because usually she's the one who gives me advice (she is so incredibly insightful. ally advice=the best.) Sigh, the night air really was amazing guys. I need to clean my bike asap and oil up those chains. I feel like I'm gonna mess everything up though lol.

9. something that makes me sad when i think about it.
four things. I don't have the courage to blatantly say what they are, but I'll just say B, A, J, J.

10. something i’ve lied about.
I lied when I told you that I wasn't ashamed, but I am.

11. would i rather be stranded on a desert island with someone i love for ten years or someone i hate for a month? explain why.
Someone I hate. Desperate times call for desperate measures, and I think that those thirty days will be tough so I'll be forced to cooperate with this person. OH SHOOT. WHAT IF WE WENT CRAZY AND KILLED EACH OTHER. NEVERMIND NEVERMIND. Someone I love most definitely.

12. something i’m currently worrying about.
my mama's sick again.

13. one person from tumblr i’d throw off a cliff, one i’d marry and one i’d fuck.
the only tumblr people I know are jonel, sam, lena, suzy, lily trinh, and dante blanco. I'll throw sam off a cliff...marry dante blanco♥...AND JUST FORGET THAT LAST ONE.

14. something i do without realizing.
sometimes my mouth opens a little when I'm interested in something x)

15. lyrics that apply to my current situation/mood.
I'm caught again in the mystery
You're by my side, but are you still with me?
The answers somewhere deep in it
I'm sorry that you're feeling it
But I just love to tell you that I love you so much these days
Have to tell you that I love you so much these days, it's true

16. a drunken story.
hmm I wasn't really drunk, but oh wells I'll tell the story anyways. When I was like seven, we were eating dinner with the whole family. I had my sprite in a red plastic cup and my mom's wine, also in a red plastic cup, was right next to it. I picked up the wine on accident and drank it. It was so nasty and bitter that I got up and ran to the bathroom. I could hear my family laughing at me lol. When I walked out my face was all red and they accused me of being drunk, but it was only because I was embarrassed.

17. something i regret.
I can be so mean.

18. post a picture of myself.

Shell toes? Yes
P.R.P.S Theres a man riding a horse on top of my chest
polo fresh, I am z' man

19. my longest relationship and who it was with.
EJ Aquino mel says three months O.O It felt longer lol.

20. press ctrl v and post.
MAMA MEL BICHO

21. post a bit of my last IM convo.
me no im.

22. 5 things i want to change.
- the world! :D
- my perspective.
- communication skills.
- my phone -_____-
- my room.

23. 5 things within touching distance.
- Phone
- Pillow
- Wall
- Couch
- Capri Sun

If you get what I get, what would you say?

2011-07-22T14:30:00.000-07:00

I'm just going to do a couple of these challenges today so I can do the picture/describe your day in detail one tomorrow :3

13 List your favourite fictional couples.

HOWL JENKINS & SOPHIE HATTER.
DEXTER JONES & REMY STARR.
RICKY UNDERWOOD & AMY JUERGENS.
OWEN & LIZ.
TAKAMI WANIBUCHI & EIMI YAMASHITA.
SATOSHI SHIMONUKI & EIMI YAMASHITA.
sigh, i forget the rest.

14 If you could play any book character in a movie, who would it be?

uuuhhhh, probably Liz from Elsewhere. All the books that I've read is escaping me right now.

15 What are your five favorite foods to snack on?

Lately, it's been
-anything with caramel.
-thai tea boba.
-pistachios.
-watermelon.
-peaches.

16 List your top ten favourite TV shows.

As of now, it's
-Adventure Time
-That's 70s Show
-Fresh Prince
-Parks and Recreation
-Keeping Up With The Kardashians.
-Secret Life.
-Switched at Birth.
-True Life.
-Extreme Couponing.
-The Best Thing I Ever Ate.
NO ORDER, JUST DOIN WHATEVS.

17 Post a picture of yourself and a sibling.

Since you guys have already seen my little brother multiple of times, I've decided to put up a picture of my little sister Katie. She should be eight now. Ah, she probably doesn't even remember me. I was only there with her as a baby and I haven't seen her since. Okay so, I went looking for this picture like crazy! It wasn't in my photo albums or frames. It wasn't even in those bag things that photo developing places put your pictures in. It wasn't in any of my boxes, nor in any of my folders or notebooks. I went crazy, because this is the only picture I have with my little sister. Then I thought, it must be somewhere special. I went to one of my special hiding spots and sure enough, there it was!

That's me and Katie on top. Lol she's crazy. She used to do this thing where she would just scream at the top of her lungs and then giggle to herself afterwards. Like she wouldn't be upset or anything, she just liked to scream x)
And that picture on the bottom...that's just me ;) "Oh hey guys, what's going on?"

Singing that this will be the day that I die.

2011-07-20T11:17:00.000-07:00

MY FIRST BLOG POST EVA.

Thursday, July 10, 2008
HEY NICE TO MEET YOU, BLAH BLAH BLAH POSTED AT 7:26 PM
yum
lime gatorade knows how to hit the spot :)

well... this is my first post
so i'll just tell you a little about me
1. I read. a lot
2. I watch tv. a lot
3. I sleep. a lot
4. I talk to my friends. a lot
5. I listen to music. a lot
6. and when im not doing any of those things,
i'm either outside having the time of my life,
or i'm day dreaming......
and the rest, i guess....
you're just going to have to find out for yourselves :P

OH!
i tend to be corny and a dork sometimes.
(i have my random moments)
so don't say i didn't warn you.

dont worry about long, agonizing waits for my next post,
cuz even though california is supposed to be,
like SUPER-DUPER FUN! in the summer...
i'm. stuck. at. home.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, THREE YEARS DAWG. THIS BLOG IS THREE YEARS OLD! STILL GOING STRONG~

you're going to find yourself somewhere, somehow.

2011-07-20T11:11:00.000-07:00

VIIIIIIIIIINNNNCCCEEEEEEEEENNNNNT♥

SUMMER'S ENDING TOO SOON T.T
I said that I was going to blog about everything, buuuuut I don't really wanna.
Basically all summer, I've been hiking, hanging out at Ally's, hanging out with Kayla, going on lunch dates, reading manga, watching movies, eating my popo's food, playing with emily, rooting on ethan while he was getting a haircut, driving to San Fran, going crazy in vintage stores, trying on fifties prom dresses♥, sauna-ing, boba-ing, driving, I GOT A CAR FOR MY BIRTHDAY :D. I haven't really told anyone lol. My mom was the one to tell my cousins and stuff, and I only told Jess and Anoop. My car smells like candy inside :3 I love it.
THE BEEEEAAACH. SO FUN SO FUN SO SUN. My heart skipped a beat when I saw the ocean. My mind was whirling with excitement when I saw the sand. The first thing I did was attempt to build something in the sand. I was so happy and excited that I felt like I needed to be working hard on something so I went straight to the sand. After I cooled off a little, I finally ventured off into the water. Iono why, but I wanted to stick with Suzy when we were hoppin those waves. Dude that ocean water made my face soooo soft O.O LOL BIRD CATCHING. It was so funny! I showed the video to my mama and she found it hilarious. She was hehehe-ing to herself x) I wonder what they were going to do after they actually caught a bird... Walking to the pier was nice :3 Kathleen's getting the hook up ;) Manatees! Bonfire! Smores! Perfect day dawg, just absolutely perfect. All that stress was so worth it. FREAKING AMAZING DAY.
HAHAHAHAHA every time we go hiking, my family's all quiet and focused when going up the mountain, but once we get to the top, we get crazy. Ally and I dance all oldschool. LOL I always run ahead of my mom and wave my arms in the air all loosey goosey "WOOOOOOOO!" I crack her up every time. You know whenever I take those career test online, it always says that I should be a comedian. Like really? There's these little secret shortcut trails that my cousins and I take. They're really intense. Like you're practically rock climbing. ADRENALINE RUSH~
Today? Going on a picnic. Eating dinner with mah homies. SPEAKING OF HOMIES! THANK YOU GUYS SOOOO MUCH FOR THE SURPRISE BIRTHDAY PARTY! My birthday was amaaaazing. I ♥ ballons. I ♥ my friends. I ♥ my family. I'm the type of person that gets really psyched up for things. So with the fact that this was a surprise birthday party, all my excitement had to rush to process itself in my mind. When I opened the garage door and everyone popped out "SURPRISE!" My heart did a double take, and I shut the door and just jumped around outside. You guys are the best! I had the greatest time. Thanks a bunch crunch. HOMIES4LIFE. LOL my mom took me to the mall to go shopping and apparently she was biding time for you guys to set up and whatnot. she kept taking me to different stores and I just kept whining, "MOOOOOOOOM, LEEET'S GOO HOOOME NOOOOW. i'm tired." "wait! this store looks nice!" I should have taken the opportunity and bought everything in sight -.-
I DIGRESS, today is my aunt Michelle's birthday :) She's like my second mom. I lived with her twice in my life, and I cried rivers both times that I had to leave. My auntie Michelle is so goofy, but she is also strict. She pushes me to my limits so that I can see just what I'm capable of. She's one of those few people that I always try to impress. I want her to be proud of me and I'm glad that I have her as my aunt, because without her I wouldn't have this drive to be a better person. I don't know how to explain it, but whenever she smiles at something I've accomplished, everything that I've struggled with seems worth it you know? Same thing goes with my mama and my baba. It's not common for my family to show affection or appreciation. We're all really close, but it's difficult to be emotional in my family. So when I see that they're happy with the things that I've done, I feel loved.

12 List the initials of everyone you’ve slept with.

I'M TAKING THIS LITERALLY.
my mama, my baba, my ama, my popo, ally, kayla, ethan, adam, kyle, morgan, melanie, samantha, kathleen, suzy, joanne, kristina, anthony, camryn, MAN I GET AROUND.

Walked on the ocean like it was dry ground.

2011-07-10T22:56:00.000-07:00

11 List the names of everyone you have texts in your inbox from

Jess Renteria
Anoop Nijjar
Alliee Lamma
Mama
Do Something
YumYum
Melanie Casupanan
Steve Quach
Auntie Betty
Lena Flair
Joanne Balleras
Uncle Johnny
Kevin Ngo
Jason Kim
Aaron Kim
Suzy Lee
Kathleen Punsalan
CHACHA

It's not that I text a lot of people at once, my inbox is just huuuuuuge. If I want to reread a text...things get crazy like planet of the apes.

mmmm, I haven't blogged in awhile dawg. A lot of good things have happened...but I'll blog about them lata. Kayla's here for the rest of her summer vacation and she's all up on facebook and tumblr day and night. It's pretty lame. So Ima get off before she comes back and tackles me. TATAFORNOWYO.

I KNOW THIS DUDE'S BALLIN, THAT'S NICE.

2011-06-22T19:25:00.000-07:00

10 Share your opinion on religon.

My family's Buddhist. So what does that make me? Buddhist? I have no idea, because I don't know much about Buddhism. My grandma can't explain Buddhism in words so that I can understand, and my mom won't even bother to explain it to me. I just know that Chinese New Year is a huge day filled with superstitions and good luck. I know that we're supposed to clean, buy a lot of food, plant a lot of plants, and cut our hair for Chinese year in order to have a great new year. But Buddhism can't just be all about superstitions, right? And God. I believe in God. I believe in a God. I believe that there's one God that people just see differently. I believe in faith and life after death. I find it amazing how someone who's faithful in God and their religion can be so happy and content with life. I envy them sometimes. Last year, someone tried their hardest to convert me to Christianity and to tell you the truth, it was annoying. All he thought was, "Either you're with me or not. If you're not, then you're going to hell." He was so blunt about it too. I tried to explain to him that I do believe in God and that I do believe in Heaven, but I can't just go and convert myself and go to church. He told me that everything that's holding me back from praising the Lord is the Devil. My family, my friends, even myself. When he mentioned my family was the devil trying to draw me in, I cried. My background is Buddhism and honestly, I love my family more than anything so I just can't. My cousin Ally, who's in the same situation as me, is trying to learn about other religions and whatnot. I try to learn too. My friend Jenny gave me a Bible to read and she even went out of her way to mark passages that she thought would be best. I also try to ask my grandma questions. I try to hang out with her other than my cousins on Chinese New Year and Half Year. I don't know guys. I'm unsure about a lot of things in my life, and this is the one of the things that I'm most unsure about. I sometimes wonder how different my life would be if I were Christian, Catholic, Jewish, Muslim, etc. I also wonder how my wedding will be like. Will I walk down the altar and say my vows? Or will I drink teas with my grandparents and receive their blessings? Will I do both? I don't know guys.

2011-06-20T22:34:00.000-07:00

Is this all that we are?

So stick with us, because Phineas and Ferb are gonna do it all.

2011-06-20T10:01:00.001-07:00

AM I THE ONLY ONE THAT THINKS THIS IS AMAZING??

Nice to meet you, huh!

2011-06-19T13:35:00.000-07:00

9 Make a list of 10 pet peeves of yours.

10. Feeling greasy. Sometimes, for no reason at all, I just want to wash my face. Like, if I'm in the same car with someone that's eating fast food and whatnot, I'll feel sooooo greasy. You can never have too much napkins and showering everyday is a must!
9. Sweeping and dusting. I cannot dust. It seems just absolutely ridiculous to me! Okay, you get that feather thing and you wipe a shelf or the fan and aaaaall this dust starts flying everywhere! Freaking insane! Then I start to choke, but that's only because I'm melodramatic. I also cannot sweep. I cannot even watch someone sweep. Seeing all those crumbs, hair, and nastiness in a pile makes me want to vomit. I can't help but to imagine myself eating it! I just can't help it! Like the hair getting caught in my throat....BLEEEEEH! So nasty.
8. Putting pillows in pillow cases. I just can't. I don't know why, I don't know how, I just can't. I can put pillows into those pillow cases where the opening is not at the end...but other than that...I just can't. Something just irks me about it and bleh..
7. When food's too hot. It's like you're sooo hungry and your stomach's crying for some nourishment, but you can't, because the food's too hot and it'll take a while for it to cool down. The smell taunts your senses, and your mouth waters from how delicious it looks. And when you just can't take it anymore, you dig right in! You have that steaming hot food in your mouth, and you're doing that thing where you blow on the food when it's in your mouth and everyone's looking at you crazy. When the food's finally cool enough to eat, you can't enjoy it because your tongue's all burnt. Sigh, so sad.
6. When I see a bug in my room. Paranoia breaks lose, and I won't sleep.
5. When people don't believe me and just assume things. Whether it's over little things or big things, it makes me really mad. Like for instance: "Who ate the last cookie?" "Wasn't me." "Suuuuure" oh heck naw -.- Sigh, I hate it when my mom assumes the worst out of me. She'll come home and make lame accusations, "You've been sitting in the same spot all day huh?" I mean, even if it's true, I'll still feel sad.
4. Having to explain something more than once. Well, it doesn't really annoy me. I just get really tired and exhausted. Like I just ran a race LOL. Because when I explain something, it's usually with a lot of enthusiasm and excitement, but the second time around I'm just wiped out dude.
3. Tailgating. I get so nervous when people tailgate me when I'm driving. Freaking ridiculous. My stepdad tailgates LOL. "Megen, watch me drive and learn." "You're probably the worst example." "Okay...okay...I see how it is.." Lol, it's true! He speeds, he never uses his turn signals, he tries to avoid using his brakes all the time, he tailgates, he stares at other drivers on the road, he doesn't pay attention, he doesn't wear a seatbelt, he hardly ever has his license with him. Ah, I'm surprised that he hasn't gotten a ticket yet. WOOOAAAH, SPEAK OF THE DEVIL. My stepdad just busted through my door. "What're you gonna do with that fifty bucks you earned?" "Nothing, save it." "You're not gonna buy me anything?" "Lol no." "Cheapo. I see how it is." LOLOLOL
2. When there's nothing good on tv. Because then, I have to find something else to do. Then my head starts to hurt, because I was so set on watching tv and I can't move on. I'd wait and channel check in thirty minute intervals.
1. Discrimination and racism. I could go on and on about how much I hate racists, but I won't. Wow, I just absolutely hate it.

Good day sunlight. I'd like to say how truly bright you are.

2011-06-17T18:42:00.000-07:00

8 Name your 5 best friends and list your 5 favourite qualities of each.

I don't just have five people that I consider close to me :/ I'm just going to bend the rules a bit and go crazy. Plus, who's gonna stop me? The tumblr challenges police? Heck naw.

Melanie Casupanan
-The way she describes things. I know she thinks that she's horrible at giving descriptions, but it's interesting to listen to how she sees things.
-Her punniness. "The brightest day of the week is Sun-day" Yes, yes. I did just do that.
-Her eyes. They're just so darn cute! They're all googly and round like a little baby. Her cheeks don't help much either x)
-I can tell her anything and she somehow understands. Especially the weird stuff... Mel and I somehow connect with each other on the most random things, it's crazy and maybe a tad bit scary. I'll call her randomly "Mel! I was just thinking about this and that" "OH ME TOO! I was just doing this and I thought this..." That's how it goes down like every time yo.
-I love how she trolls me. I'd ask her, "Hey Mel, can I use your computer?" "No." And we'll just look at each other for what seems like eternity. "Okay..." "Hahaha, just kidding, go ahead." Every time. LOL, I LIKE HOW SHE SCARES ME TOO. It's kinda exciting. She keeps me on my toes. Also, she keeps me void of hiccups. Kuddos to Mel.

Joanne Balleras
-Her crazy laugh. It's maniacal and amusing.
-This girl knows so much about me. I could say "Remember that time..." or I could bring up something important to me and she'll understand. She knows my secrets and she knows the troubles that I've been through. Sometimes, I think she knows more about me than I do myself...
-I have so many memories with Joanne. Our friendship is older than my brother lol. I know I'll never forget her and the impact she has had on my life no matter how old I get.
-She's so...real. She's the realest person I've ever met. She doesn't hold things back and stays true to herself and everyone around her. I admire her honesty and how easily she can express her opinions. It shows her bravery and the way she has fortified herself to withstand the disagreements and arguments. She's so admirable.
-I can't even narrow down this last quality to one. She's encouraging, respectful, trustworthy...she listens to me when I talk and she tells me her honest opinion. I could joke around with her too. I guess I'm like this, because Joanne has been my best friend for such a long time that I can't just choose five qualities.

Samantha Alcantara
-I love sleeping over this girl's house for some reason. We end up laughing like crazy people, it's insane. And for some reason, I sleep on a little bed with this crazy sleeper. I seriously don't know why or how. I sleep like a freakin plank and her hand is like crushing my nose and her feet poking my leg. I don't know guys, sam sleepovers are just fun. Plus, I used to sleepover her house on school nights. I thought that was an adventure all on it's own.
-Her crazy dance. I remember the first time I saw her do the dance was in her car (ON OUR WAY TO SCHOOL AFTER SLEEPING OVER HER HOUSE O.O) to this classical song. Like the beat was no where near what it should be for her dance to be practical.
-Her parents. They're so sweet!!!!!
-How easily I can mess with her. I'm so mean to her sometimes, but it's purely out of amusement I SWEAR. Sometimes she yells at me and pretends like she's about to beat me up...but I only cave in because it's all part of my plan. "What's your plan?", you ask? PSH, I AIN'T NO FOOL. I PITY THE FOOL. (LOL, I JUST HAD TO. I APOLOGIZE.) Anyway...oh yeah, Samantha's an easy target and the way she reacts is hilarious.
-She's just too cute. She's like a dog! It runs around the house all crazily, it barks so loud it gives you headaches, it eats a lot, and it follows you around everywhere. Samantha...sometimes I just want to pat her head lol. Iono, she's like a dog in a sense that it does crazy, inhuman things, but they make up for it with it's cuteness and loyalty.

Suzy Lee
-Her hair. I think it fits Suzy perfectly. She's cute, bubbly, and just different than anyone I've ever met. In my opinion, she's too good for long hair. Short hair suits her! Plus...it's really fun to play with :3
-She's fun to be around. She's hilarious and easy to talk to. She's so freakin popular and it's probably because she's so likable. I mean, who doesn't like Suzy? LOL I FEEL LIKE MEL WOULD SAY, "Me." LOL. Then Suzy would be like "Step off my nuts!" Sigh, I'm creating scenarios with my friends in my mind...I need to hang out with them asap, before I become a psycho. I digress, Suzy's just an all around likable person and I admire that.
-I love how enthusiastic Suzy is! In Hiben's last school year, she'd just surprise everyone with her laughter and the random things she yells. Mr. Hiben looooooved Suzy, because like I saaaaaid Suzy's incredibly likable. She'd shout across the room to talk to someone, she'd make crazy facial expressions, and she'd say the most hilarious things. She's just very expressive lol. LOL HER REACTIONS.
-The fact that she's Korean. Yummy foods, interesting language...I think my mom even likes the fact that Suzy's Korean LOL. Whenever we come across something Korean my mom would just bring up Suzy. "Ask Suzy if she knows this" "Lol that's Suzy" -.- My mama gets crazy sometimes.
-Her outrageous stories. She creates them right on spot! It's amazing, she should do improv.

Kathleen Punsalan
-I don't know what it is, but everything she says just makes me laugh. I think it's her tone, or her face. IONO. It's like I'm on some kind of TV show and Kathleen's a really good actress who makes random people laugh for random reasons.
-I love going over to her house! Whether it wa the time we built a huge fort, ate cheese and crackers, finished our video project, or just watched a play...I enjoy myself at Kathleen's house. And now that she moved to a bigger room...PARTYHOLICS 24/7 @KATHLEEN'S ROOM.
-Her awkward gestures are awkwardly funny. It's like Zach Glifianakis LOL. LOLOLOLOLOL HER DANCE MOVES. Man...I miss Kathleen.
-Her advice. "Just forget about it" "Don't worry about it" "I have a sixth sense about these things!" Btw, she was wrong! Iono, there was a point in time when I confided in Kathleen only and she would help me get through it all. She helped lots. Kathleen's just a really good friend. She's good at listening, telling me to get over things, and helps me prepare for whatever comes next. LOL, she like pushed me to do a lot of things, in a good way! Without her, I don't know where I'd be.
-She's like Suzy, incredibly likable. I don't understand how anyone could hate Kathleen. You're hilarious. AH I MISS MY FRIENDS.

Lena Flair
-Even though Lena and I aren't that close, I'm not afraid to be myself around her. It's weird, because I get pretty self conscious. I love how quickly Lena came into our "group". It was like meant-to-be or something lol.
-Lena's so perfect it's unbelievable. She's so well-rounded that I can't even figure how she managed to accomplish so many things in her almost sixteen years of life. And even though she's already amazing as is, she still strives to be better. I can't help but to be inspired.
-She's my only friend that watches anime and reads manga. She suggests anime shows that I should watch, and we even talk about japanese movies and whatnot. We're similar in the sense that we watch anime, and asian movies/dramas. I used to be the only one, but not any more! :D
-She's so amusing! Whenever she calls Andrew gay, I can't help but to laugh. LOLOLOLOL. "You see this seat right here? This is where gay guys sit." LOL I thought that was so witty. I love how we used to step on each other's feet. Lol so fun. And that one time I went over her house and she pushed me around on her skateboard. Ah, so much fun.
-She super pretty too. All of my friends are beautiful, but I feel compelled to say that Lena's pretty just because she hates it. It's the truth!!!

Sigh, I gotta do it guys. Don't vomit or anything, but I just gotta!
Jess Renteria
-Talking to him has become an everyday norm. Without it, my days would feel so empty. We know practically everything about each other. He can probably predict everything I say -.-
-He's so incredibly witty. I think it comes with him being a genius. He makes me laugh like crazy with just the little things he says. LOLOLOLOLOL he such a creeper. LOLOLOLOLOL.
-Sigh, I'm done. This is just too lame. Like him.

Well you might be a bit confused.

2011-06-16T16:04:00.000-07:00

7 List your five favourite physical qualities of yourself.

5. pinkies
4. height
3. hair
2. skin
1. waist

Ever had a man in here, Lucille?

2011-06-15T22:00:00.001-07:00

LOLOLOLOL. DRAMA. FRESHMAN YEAR. TONY WAS THE BEST PERSON TO ACT WITH, I'M NOT GONNA LIE.

Take my hand. Take my whole life too.

2011-06-15T21:43:00.000-07:00

5 Post a picture from the last outing you were at.

The last outing I was at was Jerom's surprise party, but I seem to have no pictures from that night in my possession. I am sor ry.

6 Post links to any online profiles you have.

FACEBOOK
YOUTUBE

...I think that's it.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
I JUST GOOGLED MY NAME AND FOUND THIS:

"In Kenya, the Men for Gender Equality Now (MEGEN) NGO who is about men challenging unequal gendered power relations could only be created through a women organisation because nobody wanted to give money to a male-run organisation. Hence it was created under the banner of FEMNET. The problem with all these talks about gender is that gender has become synonym with “women”. No surprise that so little has been achieved during the last 30 years (I beleive the first mention of gender right was in a summit in the early 1970 …)"

O.O WHAT.

LOL, If you google my name you see:
"Megen is an Escapist, how do you compare?"
"Megen is a Reformer, how do you compare?"
"Megen is a Thinker, how do you compare?"
That's just me and my personality tests :3 No big deal.

The sigh that blew me forward.

2011-06-14T12:22:00.001-07:00

Dear meanbutt,
Please return volume 6 of Lovely Complex back to the library. It's been two weeks now, and it's been long overdue. Hey, I'm only looking out for you dawg. Those fines pile up like crazy! Also...I CANNOT CONTINUE ON WITHOUT VOLUME SIX. I stand there staring at volumes seven, eight, and nine on the shelf as if volume 6 would magically appear. If you could turn it in soon, I would very much appreciate it.

-Fellow Manga reader.

Due to this major setback, I have preoccupied my time by reading the Kindaichi Case Files and Beauty is the Beast. Eimi from Beauty is the Beast reminds me of Suzy. Every time Eimi does something funny or cute, I giggle to myself "Hehehehe, silly suzy."

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL.

The Good Times are killing me.

2011-06-12T14:42:00.000-07:00

4 Hypothetically it’s your birthday, write out a five item gift wishlist.

5. This one really cute apron from Anthropologie! Okay, I just looked it up, and there's actually three really cute aprons x) So it's either the Tea-And-Crumpets Apron, HMS Lollipop Apron, or Trousseau Apron. SOOOOO CUTE.
4. Gift Cards/Money. I honestly do not mind if you give me money or gift cards, because then I can save up for stuff I plan to buy in the future.
3. Funny Birthday Cards. Something to give me a nice laugh.
2. Twilight Zone DVDs! The Complete Definitive Collection costs waaay too much, so maybe just one season or something. Iono, but what I do know is that it better be in black and white. If it's the modern one, then I wouldn't know how to react.
1. Whatevs. Ahhh, I'm drawing a blank right now T.T Just anything you think I'd like. I trust your judgement, it's all good. Necklaces, clothes, nail polish, pictures, figurines, food, candy, posters, iono dawg. iono. I'm sorry lol.

Well you are a goof!

2011-06-10T13:23:00.000-07:00

2. Make a list of all the concerts/shows you’ve been to. Bold your favourites.

Well, I've never been to a concert. I would most definitely like to go to a XX concert though!

3. Post pictures of you from the last three Halloweens.

Eighth grade...I think I was a ballerina/magician. Basically, I wore a tutu and a magician's hat LOL.
Ninth grade, I was Lady Gaga LOL. So embarrassing...I don't even...well it's all in the past now. So lame -.- facepalmtothemax!

Last year, I was Madonna. If only, if only, I had blonde hair. It was a success though! My hair was better on eighties day...Ah I love the eighties. I had A LOT of fun dressed up as Madonna, I'm not gonna lie.

Because I love you more than I could ever promise.

2011-06-09T18:38:00.000-07:00

1. Fifteen random facts about yourself.

15. I always crave fruits. ALWAAAAAAYS.
14. I absolutely love my motorcycle burn scar.
13. I still have not finished unpacking my suitcase that I brought with me to Hawaii last March.
12. I send myself postcards.
11. I see a set of numbers and I instantly see how they relate to one another. I find this so fascinating that I can't help but to tell people. I feel like I'm annoying, but it's become a habit. Like right now, it's 6:44. Two fours. Two plus four equals six. My logic makes no sense sometimes LOL.
10. I start a lot of things that I don't finish. Like I was so into making myself a red scarf, but it's been sitting on my shelf for like a year now. I only know how to play HALF of a song on the piano. My sketch book is halfway finished. I have not finished Kingdom Hearts after all those years that it has been sitting in my ps2. Heck, I haven't even finished hanging up the curtains in my room LOL.
9. I was born in San Gabriel. Lived in Rosemead with my ama and gong-gong (my dad's parents). Then after my parents broke up, my mom took me and we lived with my aunt Michelle just a couple blocks away. I lived there for awhile...pre-school, kindergarten, and first grade. Three or four years, I guess. Then my mom and my current stepdad started dating. We moved to a condo in Diamond Bar, and we lived there for a year. That condo was cool! There was a little creek in the backyard, and I would always go outside and catch tadpoles. That's where I had my first dog, Biscuit, and where my cat, Max, ran away. Spent my second grade there. Later on, my dad moved to Diamond Bar to be closer to me. My mom didn't like it, and we moved once again. We moved back with my aunt Michelle, except she had moved to Ontario. My mom and I lived there for a year. And then finally, we got our own house, here in Rancho Cucamonga, and we've been living here for the past seven years. One day, I'm just going to take the person that means the most to me and drive back to all these places. I'll tell them stories about my childhood that no else knows. I'll show them all the things I used to do, tell them about the people I met, and just show them how I came to be the person I am today.
8. Eight's my favorite number :3
7. I love my mom A LOT. Despite everything, I love her more than anyone else in the world.
6. I adore my baby pictures. I love showing them to people, it's crazy. Sure, you can call me conceited and whatnot, but when I'm looking at my baby pictures it reminds me of my childhood and when my mind is in that state, nothing can bother me. Not being biased or anything, but asian babies are the cutest. At least, they are to me. Black babies are a close second. No lie, black babies are freaking adorable.
5. I have this huge empty space above my bed and I'm just waiting for the perfect picture to put there. Something landscape and big enough.
4. I have White Chicks memorized.
3. I love interracial families. My cousin Emilie's half mexican, a quarter vietnamese, and a quarter chinese. SHE'S SO ADORABLE. I wish I could just bring her to hang out with my friends, because she says the craziest things. Like no joke, she surprises me with everything that she says. She was singing a song in spanish today, ahhhh too cuuuuute! "Le encanta mi amor y mi familia. Mi familia es mi amor"
2. I have so many plans for my future house, it's crazy. My house is going to be so insane! Secret passageways everywhere! Sliding ladders in my huge library. If we really do get a huge house built for all of us like we've planned, THAT'D BE AMAZING.
1. I'm watching Good Burger right now, and I crave in-N-out.

Drove the Chevy to the levee, but the levee was dry.

2011-06-09T18:34:00.000-07:00

THANKS MELMEL!

1 Fifteen random facts about yourself.
2 Make a list of all the concerts/shows you’ve been to. Bold your favourites.
3 Post pictures of you from the last three Halloweens.
4 Hypothetically it’s your birthday, write out a five item gift wishlist.
5 Post a picture from the last outing you were at.
6 Post links to any online profiles you have.
7 List your five favourite physical qualities of yourself.
8 Name your 5 best friends and list your 5 favourite qualities of each.
9 Make a list of 10 pet peeves of yours.
10 Share your opinion on religon.
11 List the names of everyone you have texts in your inbox from.
12 List the initials of everyone you’ve slept with.
13 List your favourite fictional couples.
14 If you could play any book character in a movie, who would it be?
15 What are your five favorite foods to snack on?
16 List your top ten favourite TV shows.
17 Post a picture of yourself and a sibling.
18 Describe your day in detail. Include pictures if you wish.
19 Talk about an obsession of yours.
20 Post pictures of you on your last three birthdays.
21 Pile all your favourite clothing items on your bed/floor and take a picture. Post it.
22 List your ten favorite foods.
23 Talk about your opinion on health/body image and what you do to stay healthy.
24 Post a picture of you and the person you were in a relationship with for the longest.
25 Post a picture from the last time you went out to a social event.
26 Take a picture of your bedroom and post it.
27 Post your current Facebook profile picture.
28 List 10 turn ons in the opposite sex. Besides the obvious (attractive, trust, honesty, etc.)
29 List your top ten favourite fictional characters/
30 Share your zodiac sign and how you think it fits your personality.

My love, you steal my sunshine.

2011-06-07T14:13:00.001-07:00

LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Risa's facial expressions get me every time! x) I'd be reading the manga on my bed and once her fish face pops up, I roll around and kick my feet in crazy laughter. Can laughing tone your stomach? THAT'D BE TTTHHHHHEEEEE BEST.
Eh, these days have been alright. I wake up, brush my teeth, wash my face, go downstairs, drink some soy milk, work on kumon with Adam, give him a snack, read manga, watch anime, play sims, sketch, make lunch, sketch, work out, make dinner, wash dishes, shower, read manga, watch tv, read manga until I fall asleep. OH NOOOOOOOOO, I'M BLOGGING. My whole schedule's thrown off now! Sigh now I gotta take something out. I'm sooooo busy guys. I have no time to blog...I guess...it's a sacrifice...but I guess I will not give Adam a snack.
Ah, livin the fast life~~
OH! Disneyland was, ~~hands down~~ hands up (because I'm so excited and my hands get all crazy in the air), the best day of my summer vacation. We were so lucky, it's unbelievable! All the planning and frustration paid off big time, because in the end everyone had an amazing time. If I could change anything...it'd be to not chicken out on the statue game last minute, to be able to ride California Screaming and Toy Story, to have time to party at elecTRONica, aaaaand to buy popcorn instead of that frozen lemonade. I was so happy that day and I was so tired afterwards. I literally just laid in bed reading manga all day yesterday. When we returned my aunt's car back to her, I don't know for sure, but I walked inside their house and started rambling about a puzzle, a painting, and a museum. They tried to make conversation with me, but I don't know what I said lol...I was so tired, it's insane.
AH I HAD SO MUCH FUN.
Confessions of a partyholic...party so hard that it hardly seems like partying. party in your sleep. party in the air. party in the ground. party in the past. party in the future. party in blenders. party in my stomach. party in the fridge. don't party in the freezer. party in the pantry. partyin partyin, yeah!
I'm sorry, I'm stir crazy.
Next up: BEEEAAAAAACCCCCH!

BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
BLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH
I'M SOOOOOO BORED.

2011-06-01T10:57:00.001-07:00

I wanna do this! I remember telling Tony about this last year and he thought it was a joke -.-

Despite my empty mouth the words are in my mind.

2011-05-28T17:50:00.000-07:00

This song is really nice, but I can't seem to find one that would work for my mixpod player. So...I'm just going to leave this here.

2011-05-28T17:29:00.000-07:00

WHAT TO DO, WHAT TO DO...

Just like back then, see how it is.

2011-05-25T20:06:00.000-07:00

I feel like I'll wake up tomorrow and go to school. Mmm...i cannot have my kickback afterall T.T I'm not as sad as I would usually be. I was really looking forward to having everyone over, but I feel nothing. I don't know what I feel actually. It's not depressing or sad...it's pretty happy. But I'm not happy enough for me to label my state of mind as that. It's kind of blissful and relaxed...comforting? IONO GUYS, IONO. It's nice, but also suspicious. School's over, but it don fel lyk it. I took down last years pictures and replaced it with the ones I just developed today :) As I was taking down the pictures, there was paper flying everywhere. It was pretty fun :3 Yeah, I'm happy :) BUT IT SUCKS THAT I CAN'T HAVE A SLEEPOVER, OR A KICKBACK, OR GO TO CORKY'S. IT WASN'T EVEN LIKE I WANTED TO DO ALL THREE. Priority List: Kickback. Corky's. Sleepover. BUT WHATEVS. I'm over it. okay not really. Okay yeah, I'm over it for now. But when tomorrow comes, I'm gonna cry. I can't go out and have fun, and I can't stay home and have fun either. Perks of being an older sister. I have a feeling that my mama won't let me do all the summer stuff that I'm looking forward too...She's going to say, "We'll see" and she'll get my hopes up like the last three times. then she'll say no at the last minute -_____- Okay now I'm just putting myself down LOL.
-DISNEYLAND
-BEACH
-CUE
-DATE
-WATERPARK
-MOVIE MARATHONS
-SLEEPOVERS
-FUN

2011-05-24T16:28:00.000-07:00

dang, look at our hair!
<---------------------

You epitomize the etymology of enthusiasm.

2011-05-24T15:12:00.000-07:00

I don't know why, but I wanted to put this up for people to see. Not on facebook though, that's just crazy. So i decided to put this on my blog, because this is how I'm feeling ;) Music's amazing, friends make me laugh, the suns coming out, and summer's a day away. I can't wait for Disneyland, the beach, cue, all those birthdays, and just going crazy. I don't want to study...and the hardest final's coming up tomorrow. I just don't have it in me right now, you know? I'm too distracted by the sun, the fresh air, and LUV-by nujabes to try to study. My indifference is returning at the worst moment, I know, but I know I'll be happy no matter what!
p.s. that's the biggest that I've smiled in awhile LOL

Why don't you play the game?

2011-05-21T23:13:00.000-07:00

to study or not to study...

...EH.

I don't know, I think so

2011-05-08T17:25:00.000-07:00

OH MY GAH I LOVE DIVERSE.
"AIN'T RIGHT"
"THE UNPREFIX"
"TIME"
OH MY GAH.

I'm taking a taxi to Kentucky, where they don't even know.

2011-05-03T22:26:00.000-07:00

It's so weird. I don't remember what I was doing or what I was looking for, but I somehow ended up in front of my bookshelf. It's very weird now that I think about it, because there was no reason for me to walk to my bookshelf when I wanted to blog about Meg and Dia... Anyways, I found the book Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde by Robert Louis Stevenson placed in a very odd spot. It was on my third to last shelf and considering that I organize my books alphabetically by last name, there's absolutely no reason for it to be there since that shelf consists of the books Meyer-Rowling...AH IONO. MAYBE I'M JUST PSYCHING MYSELF OUT. But it's bothering me like crazy. I'm absolutely sure that I did not touch this book at all since the first time I put it in its place. Thinking about what this book's about....AH I GOTTA STOP. I feel funny guys, I'm getting crazy paranoid just from one book. I mean, who was in my room that moved this book? Adam's too short to reach. My mama's been at work all day. Steve's been at work too. And heck, why this book? Why that shelf? Why Why Why. Ah, i'm going too far.
Well all in all, I came here to blog about Meg and Dia. Dia's voice just makes me happy. I wish I could post the video on here, but the youtube user that posted it disabled the embeded code -.- JUST LOOK UP "DIA BUBBLY" ON YOUTUBE, I'M 99% SURE THAT IT'LL BE THE FIRST VIDEO. She's really pretty too. Dang, I wish I could sing. You know what? I wish I had a talent that separated me from everyone else. Cooking is just perseverance, in my opinion. You can cook if you really wanted to, and the end result will turn out fine if you do things correctly. What else do people see in me...art? Nah, I have no imagination. Well at least none that enables me to have an extreme artistic talent. BLEH, I'M STILL SCARED. SORRY IF I SOUND CRAZY.

Someday I'll grow out of that.

2011-05-01T21:01:00.000-07:00

SOO...THE LOLLICAKES ARE GONNA TAKE AWHILE. sorry :/
My baking schedule's packed tight, because mother's day AND my mama's birthday is coming up LOL. I love my mama, so things are about to get crazy.
I got mi propio auto ;) It's a bright red 1994 Honda Civic Dx Coupe. This car is absolutely perfect for me. It's small, and it's not decked out with useless gadgets that I'll never use. The engine doesn't run at all, so my stepdad's working on it. My job is to wash EVERYTHING. He took the whole interior out for me to clean. It's really nice to work on your own car :) Makes it feel all the more special. The color...is alright LOL. I'll never lose my car in the parking lot that's for sure :P
I'M SO EXCITED TO START FILMING OUR PROJECT :D
I'm really into Florence and the Machine right now...
Walk To Remember is on abcfam tonight at 9 :)
I crave fruits...
These days, I've been happy :) I don't know why though. It's like an ignorant happy. I know there are things in my life that should be making me sad, but...iono. I just ain't sad. My moments of anger and frustration pass quickly even though they seem like they'll last for an eternity. There are so many things for me to worry about, but I just don't care. "Just live"

IT'S NOT THAT BAD.

2011-04-29T18:42:00.000-07:00

Two questions:
-Strawberry lollicakes or strawberry cupcakes?
-Taeyang on Jae-bum?

I'VE DECIDED IN THE TWENTY SECONDS IT TOOK ME TO TYPE THIS....LOLLICAKES. LENA GETS THE MOST.

I'm off like a dirty shirt.

2011-04-25T20:40:00.001-07:00

...if there were a career path that just required an open mind, I'd definitely go for it. Looking at all these majors makes me want to just be in college for the rest of my life. I want to learn everything that interests me instead of going straight to a major that will benefit my future occupation. I want to study Philosophy, Psychobiology, Sociology, Microbiology, Molecular Genetics, Atmospheric, Oceanic, and Environmental Sciences, Art History, Latin, Spanish, Japanese, Linguistics, Psychology, Music History, Public Health, Public Affairs, Social Thought, AHHHHHHHH THERE'S SO MUCH MORE. I don't know what to do with myself. That feeling keeps coming back, and I, well, I don't want to say. I just wish my life had a defined purpose, because that'd make everything so much easier. But...that'll make the end result less satisfying. I'm just babbling, sorry. I JUST DON'T KNOW.
Today's trip was freaking amazing, my mind's blown and I'm one step closer. Thanks Mel and Jerm! (I don't if I should call him Jerm or Kuya Jerm or Jeremy...)

You're right behind me as we fall

2011-04-21T19:44:00.000-07:00

DANG OH HOT TAMALES. This week sure went by fast now that I think about it. For some reason, I felt like it'd be a long week considering all the things that I had to wait for, but now that those things are done, time seems like it flew. I'm just gonna organize the events of this past week here, if you don't mind...

MONDAAAAAY
wow...i don't remember what happened on monday o.o What a fail way to start off this list.

TUESDAY
BLEH I DON'T REMEMBER THIS DAY EITHER.

WEEEEDNESDAAAAAAY
I for sure remember this day :D I mean, I know it was only yesterday, but still. Okay so, I was really bummed the whole day because they didn't post the link crew list and I was like "... -.-" the whole day. I've said this like four times already, I hate it when my hopes get crushed. Even though they were gonna post the list a day later, I was still a little off. Imagine it like this: It's your birthday. Yo mama walks in with a HUUUUUGE gift. You're screaming of excitement, thinking, "AH, WHAT COULD IT BE? I CANNOT WAIT TO FIND OUT WHAT'S INSIDE THIS IMPOSSIBLY LARGE BOX." Then yo mama walks right past you and says, "Op, gotta wait till tomorrow." BLEEEEH.
After school, I went to the gym for the first time :D I just did whatever Ally told me to do lol. I stretched Mr. Hall style, ran a mile on the treadmill, lifted ten pound weights (three sets of ten. DANG I SOUND LEGIT.), did leg extensions with 60 pounds/then 40 pounds/then 20 pounds, and lastly, I did a hundred crunchies with ten pounds. WOOOHOOOOOOOOO. Afterwards, me and ally were just chilling underneath the stairs and she was telling me about how she wants a six pack. EEEEW, is what I said. She looked at me with the most shocked expression I've ever seen her do, "WHAT DO YOU MEAN EW. YOU DON'T WANT A SIX PACK?" "uh, no." "WHY NOT?" "Because if I were to look down at my body, I'd think I were a man." "-.-" I want a tight stomach, but six packs...that's just pushing it.
Then we got to ally's house, I ate as fast as I could, then when I got home, MY DRIVING INSTRUCTOR WAS PARKED IN THE DRIVEWAY. There I was, in my sweaty work out clothes. -.- I was immediately put into the driving seat, which scared me like crazy. I backe dout of the driveway and headed straight towards the freeway. DRIVIN THE FREEWAY ON MY FIRST TIME DRIVING. WHATTHEHECK. I was freaking out. Every time I'd focus on the road, my speed would change. Every time I made sure my speed was constant, I'd swerve a little. Then i had to do traffic checks and siiiiigh, my heart was bumping the whole time. I dropped this guy names Tyler off at his house, and I practiced parking and backing up next to a curb. I'm bomb at driving in residential areas, psh stop signs? covered. Near the end of my lesson, I got the hang of it. I'm just afraid that I'll forget everything when I get behind the wheel again. PHEW, THAT WAS A RUSH.

THURSDAAAAY
I'M GETTIN BORED SO IMA SPEED THINGS UP A LITTLE.
SCHINDLER'S LIST IN LONGO'S.
NICE SONG IN HIBEN'S. HIBEN AGREES WITH ME ABOUT GWEN STEFANI, AND HE SAYS THE OFFICE SCARES HIM.
MADE IT FOR THE LINK CREW INTERVIEWS. I'M IN THE SAME GROUP AS JASON LOLOLOL.
GOT MY GLASSES :D IMA WEAR THEM TOMORROW, I'M STILL A LITTLE DIZZY THOUGH. I ALMOST FELL DOWN MY STAIRS, AND I CAN SEE THE ELECTROMAGNETIC SPECTRUM. IF I SQUINT, I CAN SEE THE FUTURE. DON'T DOUBT ME WITH MY GLASSES, IT'S A BLAST FROM THE PAST. I MIGHT ACT A LITTLE DIFFERENT WITH MY GLASSES, JUST SAYING.

let's stop talking, let's get to it, let's fall in love.

2011-04-18T19:06:00.000-07:00

2011-04-12T17:13:00.000-07:00

The Had Section.

1. If you HAD to get a tattoo, where would you want it and what would you get?
-Hmmm...maybe on my wrist. On my waist is too seductive and on my shoulder is too WalkToRemember-ish. Everywhere else is just wack to me.

2. If you HAD to dye your hair which color would you choose?
-I really want to bleach my hair and make the tips like different shades of pink. I want to do something crazy and outrageous once I'm independent...I know I'll look insane, but I really don't care about how I physically look to other people anymore.

3. If you HAD to get a piercing (THAT ISN’T YOUR EARS) what would you get pierced?
...my elbow. LOLJK THAT'S GROSS. Maybe my lip :P

4. If you HAD to change your name…what new name would you choose?
Right now I'm really into "Hanami", but I cann't see myself being anything other than Megen. HECK, I can't even see myself as a Megen sometimes.

The Would You Section.

1. If you could go bungee jumping, would you?
YES. A MILLION TIMES YES.

2. Would you move somewhere else, if you could?
YES. TEN MILLION TIMES YES. I waaaaaaas planning on being an exchange student in Japan, but...well yeah.

3. If you were given the chance to go to Paris, would you go?
Of course (:

4. If you found 10 million dollars, and it was YOURS to spend, what would you do with it?
THROW A HUGE PARTY JUST FOR MY CLOSEST FRIENDS. BUT NOT TOO HUGE. I'd pay for college, help Joanne out, give money to my parents and my grandparents, and save the rest.

Let’s Say Section.

The 1. Let’s say you see a big ship sink…only 3 people have a chance to survive. The 3 people are Your Best Friend, Your Boyfriend/Girlfriend, and a long lost friend (that you don’t know too well)…who would you save if you HAD to?
First of all, I don't have a boyfriend. Second of all, I'm just gonna ignore the "the long lost friend that you don't know too well" because that doesn't even make sense. I WILL SAVE YOU BEST FRIEND.

2. Let’s say you became President…what is the first thing you would do?
CASUAL THURSDAYS. LOL IONO...THAT JUST POPPED IN MY HEAD. The first thing I'd do...is swivel around in the chair in the oval office screaming, "I'M THE FIRST WOMAN PRESIDEEEENT, WEEEEEEE~"

3. Lets say you had to eat a tarantula for $1,000..would you?
If it’s cooked, sure.

4. Let’s say you could star in any movie (made or in the works) what movie would you star in?
STEP UP WOULD BE REALLY COOL TO BE IN.

The Favorites Section.

1. Color?
blue :P

2. Current song?
Tonight (acoustic) by Lykke Li.

3. Shirt you own?
NOODLE :3

4. Electronic device?
Probably my cell phone because I feel so lost without it.

5. Movie?
My Neighbor Totoro. I bought it over the weekend, and I have been watching it everyday with my brother. He loves it :)

6. Book?
Howl's Moving Castle. This book just gets to me :3

7. Pair of shoes?
CONVERSE. kickin it old school.

8. Sandal color?
purple :P I was at Old Navy, standing it front of their huge selection of different colored sandals and I was just really feeling the purple ones LOL. It's like...lavender.

9. Hair color?
Depends...but...well, IONO.

10. Eye color?
IONO.

The Other Stuff Section.

1. What makes your bedroom unique?
"The fact that it’s mine." -EXACTLY. It's two small rooms put into one, and it contains the products of my past hobbies. My bed's magic.

2. Who do you like?
BLEEEEEEEEEH.

3. Do you go to parties?
UH...ALL THE TIME. loljk, eh, not really :/

4. What’s your favorite season of the year?
SPRING! but i'm really feelin summer right now...

5. Do you like cheese?
a moderate amount, yes.

6. What’s bothering you now?
right now? MY SHOULDER'S INFLAMED. MY NECK HURTS LIKE CRAZY. MY LEFT WRIST ACHES. I WANT A BEACH BODY. I DON'T FEEL PREPARED FOR THE MATH CST. I'M TIRED. I THOUGHT JOANNE DIED LAST NIGHT. I'M TOO LAZY TO COOK DINNER. MY FLOWERS HAVEN'T BLOOMED YET. HOMEWORK. THE SCHOOL YEAR SHOULD JUST END ALREADY. I'M HUNGRY BUT I SON'T WANT TO EAT. I HAVE NO PASSION FOR ANYTHING. I NEED TO DECIDE WHAT I WANT TO DO WHEN I GROW UP.

And I gotta admit that you got my attention

2011-04-06T18:30:00.000-07:00

MMM....IONO. I haven't blogged for a week! Crazy stuff, but I don't know what happened. TOO MUCH STUFF APPARENTLY. LOLJK NAW.

Longo's test was whatevs, shrug the shoulders, pout the mouth, look off to the side, tilt the head, hold up those hands. WHAAAAATEEEEEVS.
I GOT MY PERMIT! WOOHOO! wiggle the legs, stick the arms straight out, put those hands into fists, move those fists in a horizontal circular motion, nod that head. PARTAAAAAY.
Mel's sleepover was really fun. I haven't hung out with my friends like that in a loooong time. I really hope my mom changes her mind about arya's birthday thing....WHATEVS. Anyways, we painted our nails, ate some fried chicken and coleslaw, made ICEES...LOLOLOL JEROM AND I TRIED TO MAKE ICEES LIKE SIX TIMES, ALL TO NO AVAIL. LOLJK, we were successful once, just once! Pretty good icee :P Then we started dancing for some reason. Me, Mel, Suzy, and Kathleen danced Bad Girl Good Girl and duuuuuude we're gonna be so pro when we're finished learning it all. Joanne and Jerom were learning a choreo too...Superhuman? I think that's what it's called. I also showed everyone a choreo I learned, but I was embarrassed. I don't know what happened! I used to dance wondergirls like nobody's business in eighth. Things change I guess. Then we watched Hangover like a bajillion times. I laughed when I saw Suzy trying to turn the tv off x) We watched Jersey Shore....I had trouble sleeping. My back was hurting and my shoulder was going CRAZY! I kept waking up and sleeping, it sucked. Then we played Mario Party 8 :D MEL AND I WON~ WOOOHOOOOO. Then we played Just Dance, and maan, I need to step it up. When everyone left, Melanie and I just talked which was really nice. I feel like I'm drifting from everyone, but whenever I hang out with them, I just forget about it all. There's so many things I don't know and I wish people would keep me updated...but then again I'm probably not worth being updated seeing as how I'm never there for anyone. If I sound depressing, I'm sorry, I'm just sleepy LOL.
OHYEEEEEEAAAH....I watched Suckerpunch. I almost forgot. It was aight. The theatre played it reeeeaaaally loud though. Totally a guy movie. The girls are beyond beautiful. The action's intense. The music's intense. Emily Browning should've been Bella Swan...
My sense of time is off. I went to sleep thinking that today was friday and i went to school thinking that today was thursday. SIGH. I'M TIRED BUT I CAN'T SLEEP.
I'm rambling...i don't even know what's going on. I'm like half asleep right now.
I MISS JOOOOAAAANNNE BALLERAS.
I WANT TO GO TO DISNEYLAND.
MY MAMA IS REALLY INTO MAKING SMOOTHIES FOR SOME REASON. DIFFERENT FLAVORED SMOOTHIES COMING LEFT AND RIGHT, ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT.
I'VE BEEN DRINKING A LOT OF WATER...
I WANT MY FINAL DRAFT BACK, NOW!
PERIOD TWO SAHAGUN=CALCULATOR ART.
I'M FAT.
I'M DONE.

OH! LENA YOU BETTER WATCH OUT. MY FEET WILL CRUSH YOURS >:P YOU TOO JESS. DOUBLE HOP!

Love might bring us back together~

2011-03-29T19:28:00.000-07:00

Day 29- A picture of yourself.

Turn your scars into stars.

2011-03-28T19:30:00.000-07:00

Day 26- What are some little things that make you feel all warm and fuzzy?
Hmmmm...watching my favorite movies/shows underneath my blanket, meeting someone you can easily connect with, laughs, hot chocolate from Seattles Best Coffee, Ally's snickerdoodles, Michelle's chocolate chip cookies, chips and salsa, babies, dogs, baths, rice krispies, sleeping in, waking up and just feeling great, compliments, helping others, making people laugh, sound of rain, love, family, friends, classic love movies, BLEHBLEH, sketching, organizing my room while pumping up music, dressing up, taking pictures with my disposable camera, IONO WHAT ELSE. I'M GETTING KINDA SAD THINKING ABOUT ALL THIS.

Day 27- A picture of your handwriting
I DON'T WANNA TAKE A PICTURE OF MY HANDWRITING. MY PHONE'S WACK, AND USING MY WEBCAM IS LAME. I'LL JUST...I'LL JUST DESCRIBE IT TO YOU. IT'S SOMETIMES ILLEGIBLE. IT LOOKS LIKE A CROSS BETWEEN CURSIVE AND...NON-CURSIVE LOL EVEN THOUGH I BARELY EVER WRITE IN CURSIVE. MY LETTERS ARE PROBABLY CONNECTED, BECAUSE I WRITE IN HASTE. SOMETIMES MY v's LOOK LIKE r's. WHENEVER I WRITE MY NAME AT THE TOP OF THE PAGE, THE WAY I WRITE MY M'S AND N'S CHANGES FREQUENTLY. I THINK IT HAS SOMETHING TO DO WITH MY MOOD...AT LEAST I HOPE SO, BECAUSE THAT'D BE PRETTY COOL.

Day 28- Do you wish for anything at 11:11? If so, what do you wish for?
Yup! It changes. Well now it does. Before, I used to wish about the same ol' thing, but then my feelings changed and well yeah. Since those wishes were in the past...I guess it's okay to tell you...right? AH! NEVERMIND, IT'S SAFER TO BE SAFE.

Put it down on me.

2011-03-27T18:51:00.000-07:00

I'm so hyped up, yet I feel so tired. Does that make sense? I feel like I can take on the world, but I would knock out instantly if I hit my bed. I was falling asleep in the car and everything -.-
I ran two miles today guys. In the beginning, I was totally over-exaggerating the circumstances in my mind. I pictured myself fainting and gasping for air. I pictured myself tumbling down a hill. I pictured myself being trampeded by everyone else. But none of those things happened! The only thing close to a disaster was me stepping into a huge puddle. The marathon hadn't even started yet and my shoes were already soaking wet -.- It was crazy though, because the rain stopped a couple minutes before the marathon started. JUST OUR LUCK. No sarcasm intended.

Okay I'm being completely serious, I'm not trollin', I'm not lyin', I'm not messin', I'm not jokin', and I'm not kiddin'. I ran the marathon right next to Josh Duhamel and Fergie. Not the whole two miles though, maybe just like a couple minutes or so. Josh Duhamel is definitely more handsome in person and Fergie is DEFINITELY more pretty in person. Seeing Josh Duhamel, it felt like a transformer would bust out of nowhere and Josh would switch into combat mode like in the movie. And seeing Fergie...man, she has swag even when she's wearing plain old running clothes. SWEAT PANTS, HAIR TIED. Okay, her hair was in a braid, but same difference.

The best part of the whole marathon though, was that I ran the whole two miles. I feel like I'm being trolled, because I feel like I'm dying when I run the pony. But my uncle Izzy checked the distance and we ran approximately 2.6 miles. 1.3 miles to the Santa Monica pier, and 1.3 miles back. This is why I feel like I can take on the world lol. I was so proud of myself afterwards :3 People were giving us high fives and cheering us on, it made me feel really good inside. I think I might run more marathons in the future..

The worst part of the whole marathon though, was that I didn't get to get a shirt T.T I mean, getting a shirt is a must! But that thing costed $25 and none of us brought money except for my aunt Betty and my uncle Izzy. There's no way that they'll spend $125 to buy us shirts. And there's no way that we would even ask. I wish I had brought my money...

After the marathon we went to Venice Beach and just walked around. Uncle Izzy bought me a bracelet, which was nice. We went to a freak show and saw a sword swallower, a girl who could flip her appendages around anywhere, two-headed turtles, two-headed snakes, two-headed lizards, two-headed chicken, five-legged dog, and the wolf man. I love the carnival style, you know...the posters and the tents, it's just cool. I researched Harry Houdini in freshman year, and learning about him was incredibly interesting. Harry Houdini seems like he'd be an amazing person to meet. He was described as childish, respectful, talented, and just amazing. He's like Howl Jenkins (the one from the book, considering that the movie and the book Howl are practically different). Harry was charming, considerate, and playful. Anyways...we walked some more ate some hot dogs....LOL KAYLA AND I FOUND THIS HAND SANITIZER IN THIS ONE STORE. I COULD NOT STOP LAUGHING FOR A GOOD TEN MINUTES.

LOL this guy was playing the drums and Ally started popping her chest and her butt LOL. "It's the african girl inside of her coming out." (My uncle Johnny nicknamed her BLACK AL. LOL. I'm Nuoc Nam -.-) This group of guys were all laughing at her, it was hilarious. OH I ALMOST FORGOT! As we were walking, we saw these people asking for donations to the Japan Relief Fund. As we were walking past, one of the guys yelled "ONEE-CHAN!" I turned around and looked at him thinking, "He better not be talking to me. I am definitely not older than him." Then he started rapping to me! In Japanese! I'm starting to think Henrik"s right...I guess I look Japanese LOL. Anyways, I just smiled and walked away with my family. I wonder what he was saying :/

Afterwards we went back to my popo's house and ate some homemade pho. MMMMM. And some chinese donuts. MMMMM. We were picking out a movie to watch, but we couldn't watch it because we were gonna leave soon. So, we had a hula hooping contest. KAYLA'S A MASTER HULA HOOPER. Then we went to Ikea and walked around. That store's so fun! I can't wait till I get my own place and I'll get to shop for my own furniture. IKEA IS THE PLACE TO GO FOR ME.

Then they dropped me off at home and I told my mom about my day, and now here I am blogging. What's my plan for the night? SHOWER, SLEEP, DONE.
Tomorrow, I'm gonna do my homework and hopefull make more shirts. I've been in a shirt making mood.

You're so hypnotizing.

2011-03-26T20:53:00.000-07:00

Okay, well here goes nothing, I'm gonna blog about my trip to Hawaii!

Sunday~
I woke up at four a.m. got ready, doubled checked my stuff, ate breakfast, and literally just sat downstairs and watched anime. The rest of my family didn't wake up until five -_________- I went into my mom's room, and she's just chillin in her bed watching the news. She looked at me and was like, "Are you that excited?" LOL, DUDE WE HAD TO LEAVE THE HOUSE BY 5:30. I WAS REALLY CURIOUS TO SEE THEM ALL GET READY IN THIRTY MINUTES. I went to my stepdad's room to wake him up and I literally just stood in the door way and yelled, "WAKE UP." He got all startled and jump off his bed LOLOLOL "F-ING SCARED THE SH- OUTTA ME! YOU'RE LIKE A GHOST!" LOLOLOL.

When everyone was ready and everything was all packed into the car, we drove to my grandma's house in LA. We picked her up, changed cars, and my uncle Johnny dropped us off at the airport. We did all the airport stuff, and the whole time I was just thinking to myself how fun it would be to work in the airport. Everyone jokes with each other, and you get to meet people from far off places. But then I realized that it's monotonous and it's starts to lose it's appeal after awhile. When we got on our plane, I found out my seat was 13A -.- My heart was unsettled the whole ride. I sat next to people I didn't know, and worst of all I was in the window seat. Although having the window is a plus, having to squish people in order to go to the bathroom is insane. That is why...I did not use the restroom on the plane. I didn't even order a drink, because I was afraid that the flight attendant wouldn't hear me and I'd have to repeat myself a bajillion times like a fool, spilling my drink, or even knocking someone with my arm reaching for the drink. So I took the safe route and just sat there. I listened to music, sketched, and watched Inflight Entertainment. AZIZ ANSARI♥
When we finally landed, it was 10:00 am in Hawaii. I WAS HUN-GA-RY. Hawaii's so beautiful. The weather's amazing. The people are really mellow. The view is brilliant. It's just breathtaking. After we got to our hotel and put away all our clothes, we walked down to Rainbow Drive In. LOCO MOCO, MMMMM GOOD STUFF MAN, GOOD STUFF. ORANGE HAZE~ Then we went back to the hotel, and I just sat in our balcony and enjoyed our ocean view. JUST AMAZING. Then at 4:30...time for luao!
It was a commercial luao, not a legit luao -.- BUT WHATEVS, IT WAS FUN. My family went kayaking, which I passed on. It was literally one circle on the beach shore. I just took pictures of them and got some shells and rocks for Kathleen. I made a headband too! If you put a flower on your left ear it means you're taken. Right, single&lookin. Middle, confused. Both ears, taken but looking for an upgrade LOLOLOL. I got pictures!

YEEEEEUUUP. My brother went up on stage and did the hula x) He's so crazy. I think the picture I took of my family kayaking is pretty legit :3 Anyways, the show was good. The food was alright. Then we went back to the hotel. I fell asleep on the bus and hit my head on the window -.- OH! I FORGOT TO SAY. MY STEPDAD KEPT TELLING EVERYONE THAT WE WERE FROM CHINATOWN. IT WAS SO EMBARRASSING. Went back to the hotel, showered, and slept.

Monday~
Woke up, got ready, went downstairs, bought some food, went back upstairs, gave the food to my family, and ate. OH! I ALSO FORGOT TO SAY THAT I STAYED IN ONE ROOM WITH MY GRANDMA AND MY PARENTS AND MY BROTHER STAYED IN A DIFFERENT ROOM. I GOT MY OWN BED~. My grandma wakes up sooo early.. I digress, okay, so then we went on a tour bus and went to the Arizona Memorial (Pearl Harbor), Sunset Beach, Waikiki Beach, Pali Lookout, Byodo-In Temple, Waikane, and the Dole Plantation. The Arizona Memorial was like a huge studying bonus for me :3 Practically everything there is what we're gonna test on in History, so it was nice to visually see everything. I also gave my mom a little history lesson x) I bought Mr. Longo some stuff ;) LOL, I JUST BOUGHT HIM A NEWSPAPER AND A COPY OF THE PEACE TREATY. Nu-uano Pali was AMAZING. SO FREAKIN BEAUTIFUL. IT'S REALLY WINDY THOUGH. People go up there to commit suicide and the wind would push them back. At the temple, my family and I prayed with all the other tourists watching us. It was kinda awkward. Then Adam and I fed the birds and the koi fishes. I'M A BIRD WHISPERER. BIRDS ARE JUST NATURALLY ATTRACTED TO ME. More pictures~

THIS IS WHAT I'M SAYING IN THE LAST PICTURE: "ADAM. MOMMY BETTER NOT BEING TRYING TO TAKE A CANDID PICTURE OF US." LOLOLOL.
Then we went back to the hotel. I showered, and slept blahblahblah. We didn't eat dinner though, which was wack.

Tuesday~
Another tour! This time we woke up at 3:00 am, and flew to Hilo. Our tour bus driver/guide was HILARIOUS. He told us he just broke out of prison two days ago, "so please excuse my mistakes". He was a funny guy x) We went to a black sands beach, Kona Coffee place, Mauna Loa Macadamia Nuts place, volcano, waterfall, and an orchid garden. BLACK SAND PARA KATHLEEN. Turtles <3. My brother and I hung out outside while everyone was inside the coffee place drinking coffee, it was LAME. MMM...MACADAMIA NUTS. MACADAMIA NUT SHELLS PARA KATHLEEN. The volcano was alright. Hiking through the tunnels was more fun though. Our bus driver told us to stare at the waterfall and then look up and you'll most definitely see a rainbow. NO JOKE, I WAS STANDING THERE THE WHOLE TIME, STARING INTENSELY AT THAT WATERFALL. NO RAINBOW WHATSOEVER. I remember thinking to myself as I was walking back to the bus, "THIS BUS DRIVER BETTER WATCH OUT." LOLJK, I DIDN'T DO ANYTHING. more more pictures~

After all this, we flew back to Oahu. Once we got back to our hotel room, I went downstairs and bought some stamps and postcards. I wrote them all before I went to sleep, so if yours doesn't make any sense, I WAS HALF ASLEEP. sorry :P

Wednesday~
FREE DAY! SLEPT IN LIKE A ROCK! ERRRRG! Got up, went downstairs in mah pajamas, and ate the biggest pancake I've ever seen in my life O.O Then I went back upstairs, got dressed, and went snorkeling :D Snorkeling was so fun! It took me a while to get used to it all though. I swallowed some mouthfuls of REALLY salty water, scrape myself some on the reef, and took goofy pictures of fish with my uncoordinated swimming skills. After I got the hang of it, snorkeling was a breeeeeze. MY MAMA AND I WANNA GO SNORKELING AGAIN. When my underwater pictures develop, I shall show you guys :P I got scratched up pretty bad, so I had to sit out of the water. I was feeding birds and it was crazy. I had bread crumbs in my palm and I put my hand flat on the ground with my palm faced up. This bird pitter-patter it's way to my hand and just chilled on my hand for a good twenty minutes. It was just sitting there, it was hilarious! LOLOLOL. Then we went back to the hotel and showered and then went to chinatown. My stepdad started talking to this one local who walked us to a good restaurant, which was nice. Then we went back to the hotel and slept.

Thursday~
PACK PACK PACK. HURRY HURRY HURRY.
After all that, we walked around the Oahu shopping district. My stepdad bought a whole bunch of shirts for everyone back home. I picked myself out a cheesy souvenier shirt :3 We ate at this hello kitty buffet....THE FOOD WAS DELICIOUS. SO MANY JAPANESE PEOPLE IN HAWAII MAN...then we walked back to the hotel and left for the airport. flew home blahblahblah I'M TIRED. Anyways, they played The Office twice on the plane, I WAS SO HAPPY. okay, okay that's pretty much it. I got home, showered, and just crashed on my bed.

GOOD NIGHT! I'M GONNA RUN A MARATHON TOMORROW IN SANTA MONICA, WISH ME LUCK! BUT YOU SHOULD ALSO WISH JAPAN LUCK! TWO MILES DAWG, I HAVEN'T FULLY REALIZED HOW CRAZY THIS IS YET. IT'S FOR A GOOD CAUSE THOUGH, AND I'M CONFIDENT WITH MY WILL POWER.

I think I should start by saying,

2011-03-25T11:03:00.000-07:00

I'm just gonna catch up with my thirty day challenge...

Day 20- Concerts you have attended

I haven't attended any concerts.
I wanna go to a Coldplay concert and a XX concert. I think they'd be amazing live.

Day 21- Turn on's and Turn off's

Turn Ons:
laughter, smiles, humor, confidence, nice, respect, chivalry, playful, understanding

Turn Offs:
disrespect, obnoxiousness, hypocrites, immature, liars, playas!

Day 22- A picture of what you wore today

hmmm....the 22nd was Tuesday...I think I have a picture.
UGH, MY STEPDAD BROUGHT THE USB CORD WITH HIM TO WORK. I'LL UPLOAD IT LATER WHEN I BLOG ABOUT MY TRIP.

Day 23- A letter to someone. Anyone.

Dear Ally,
Thank you for taking care of my plants while I was in Hawaii. I hope you didn't kill them. I will see you soon when we run the japan marathon together! Afterwards we should play Nazi Zombies, because I'm improving. I might just bike to your house after I'm done with all this...SAVE SOME FRIED CHICKEN FOR ME.
Love, Mejo.

Day 24- Seven Things That Cross Your Mind A Lot

7. 7'm hungry.
6. Am I blushing?
5. 7 need to improve..
4. My brother'5 crazy
3. BLEEEEE3H.
2. I'm tired.
1. LOL.

iono, i forgot what I think about LOL.

Day 25- Would you rather date someone plain with an amazing personality or someone beautiful with a plain personality?

To me, beauty not only includes looks but also personality. So this question is wack to me too LOL. Nevertheless, I would most definitely rather date someone plain with an amazing personality. Looks can only go so far, you know?

I WILL BLOG ABOUT MY TRIP LATA. I'M TOO TIRED AND HUNGRY.

Or should I talk about her smile?

2011-03-18T17:00:00.000-07:00

Day 19- List the places you've lived at.

1. Rosemead
2. San Gabriel
3. Diamond Bar
4. Ontario
5. Etiwanda

mmm...I know Ontario and Etiwanda are both considered Rancho Cucamonga, but whatevs.

I'M GOING TO BE IN HAWAII FOR SPRING BREAK. I WON'T BE ABLE TO BLOG, OH WELLS. UNLESS THE HOTEL WE'RE STAYING AT HAS FREE WI-FI, BUT I DOUBT IT. I WANT A WATERPROOF DISPOSABLE CAMERA. I WILL OBTAIN IT SOON. YOU WILL BE ABLE TO VIEW PITURES OF MY UNDERWATER ADVENTURES. I'M EXCITED. I'M SAD THAT I'M GOING TO MISS OUT HANGING WITH EVERYONE ONCE AGAIN. DON'T HAVE TOO MUCH FUN WITHOUT ME.

I am the fastest one of all,

2011-03-16T15:38:00.000-07:00

If you had to choose someone to sleep next to every night, who would it be?
hmmmm....I honestly don't even know. It'd probably be Joanne, because she doesn't snore, move around, or hog my blankets. She knows I have sleeping problems, and she gives me space. She doesn't touch my pillow. IF YOU EVER COME INTO MY ROOM. DO. NOT. TOUCH. MY. PILLOW. I will get so grossed out that I'll have to wash it and not sleep with a pillow until it's done washing. I don't even touch my pillow unless I've showered. Just don't touch my pillow and we'll be fine. When Kayla started messing with me and my sleeping problems, I felt like crying. I was so frustrated, you don't even know -.- Oh! Also, Joanne and I talk whenever we sleep together. We talk and we laugh, it's nice.

Do you think relationships are even worth it?
absolutely, why wouldn't it? If I felt that relationships weren't worth it, then I'd be living under a rock. I wouldn't have any friends or family...dude this question's wack. Of course they're worth it.

Have you ever kissed anyone eighteen years or older?
Yeah. I used to have this fear that I'd die in my sleep. I had it all the way up to when I was nine. I would kiss my parents good night and tell them that I loved them. I only stopped, because they started making fun of me.

Why are you happy?
I'm happy because of a lot of things! Like I said, gardening makes me happy, melanie's twitching lip makes me happy, 5377 makes me happy, suzy's laugh makes me happy, Lena's screaming makes me happy, Samantha's craziness makes me happy, fruits make me happy, the way Kathleen just is makes me happy, wearing t-shirts I've made makes me happy, my grandma's cooking makes me happy, when mr. hall doesn't make us run the pony makes me happy, when mr. longo and mrs. landau relate lessons to their lives makes me happy, when senor hiben acknowledges me during class makes me happy, good grades makes me happy, my room makes me happy, music makes me happy, sleeping makes me happy, anoop and aaron's laugh makes me happy, making a basketball shot makes me happy, daichi makes me happy, night time makes me happy, reminiscing makes me happy, candy makes me happy, the lady at the textbook window makes me happy, that guy that asked me if I wanted a drink with that when I just ordered a drink makes me happy, arcades make me happy, Candace's nonchalant jokes in Bio make me happy, Walter's meows make me happy, shooting jonel makes me happy, A LOT OF THINGS MAKE ME HAPPY. I COULD GO ON TILL THE BREAK OF DAWN.

After taking a shower, do you change in the bedroom?
UH I CHANGE IN THE BATHROOM. IT'S TOO COLD WHEN I WALK OUTSIDE THE BATHROOM AFTER I SHOWER.

Who were your last 3 texts from?
ChaCha, MelMel, Jess Renteria

Are you afraid of falling in love ?
I used to be, but not so much anymore. I was afraid of the other person mostly. Them not being happy, being hurt, or them hurting me.

How’s your heart lately?
It's weird, today I kept putting my hand to my heart. I'd move my arm to write something down or grab something, and I'd do a double take and think, "WHATHTEHECK? Where'd my hand just come from? My chest? Why was it there?!" I think...my body's telling me that my heart needs to be felt.

Have you ever liked the same person for more than a year?
Yeah. Looking at him today, I question myself. We're polar opposites, and you wouldn't even think that we knew each other. But I still appreciate him for what he used to be and how he would treat me differently than others.

Will you be in a relationship in the next few months?
IONO. "B- I DON'T KNOW YOUR LIFE"

If someone told you they’re interested in you right now, what would you say?
like someone who's not THAT someone?
"lol nah"

Say you had a baby with the last person you kissed?
NASTY. I'M PRETTY SURE THE LAST PERSON I KISSED WAS MY GRANDMA.

Why did you kiss the last person you kissed?
She's my grandma and that's just how I do.

Has anyone seen you in your underwear in the past three months?
CREEPERS IN THE LOCKER ROOM. loljk. My cousin and I were speed changing to go somewhere.

Is there a specific moment you can replay in your mind perfectly?
THERE ARE MANY.

Will you talk to someone on the phone tonight?
probably MelMel. probably RESTRICTED. probably my mama.

Remember the first time you kissed the last person you kissed?
nope.

When was the last time you cried?
the night before yesterday's.

Have you ever been hurt that you wanted to stop feeling completely?
No.

What if your parents told you that you were moving, right now?
To be completely honest, like I'm sorry, but I'd be worried about my room. I love my room. I wouldn't want some stranger sleeping in my room. I think moving to a different place would be an adventure. But that's just what I say now. I'll miss everyone here like crazy.

What were you doing at 2AM last night?
SLEEPIN LIKE A ROCK.

Let me guess, your last incoming call was from the opposite sex?
YUP

Let me guess something in your body hurts?
I'm sitting on my leg and I'm too lazy to move it. It has fallen asleep -.-

Ever wear non matching socks?
i think it's an adventure.

Who is your best-friend?
I have several. But if I were to choose with the thought of who's been there for me unconditionally and who has seen me at my weakest and at my best, it'd probably be Joanne Balleras and Anoop Nijjar. Although I don't talk to either of them like I used to, I still consider them as my best friends because I owe them that much.

Where was the last place you fell?
I don't even know...I don't remember the last time I full on fell. I trip A LOT, but not fall.

What would your name be without the first two letters?
gen :P GENGEN. If you make it cutesy, then it'd be genie x)

Do you have an older brother?
noooope

Do you laugh a lot?
YUP xD

Last person/s you gave a hug to?
Darien Fisher.

Yo I gotta put some action onto paper

2011-03-16T15:23:00.000-07:00

I ♥ gardening. :)
It's so fun! I love waking up and immediately running downstairs to see my "garden". I love hoping for the best. Well...not even the best, I'm content with anything that grows. If it doesn't grow...I wait. My strawberries didn't even start to grow until like two months after I planted them. BUT I PERSEVERED! :D Right now I'm growing Chives, Strawberries, Forget-Me-Nots, and Cilantro. I just planted the Cilantro yesterday, so nothing has sprouted yet. The Chives are getting pretty tall. The strawberries are just like cute little leaves >.< The Forget-Me-Nots have pretty sturdy leaves compared to the rest. They're shiny. Tis going well, tis going well :)
Gardening makes me happy.

Day 18- Name the TV show you have become addicted to

THE OFFICE. Even though I don't watch any of the new ones, I'm still addicted. I perfectly content with reruns, because they make me laugh nevertheless. I literally laugh the whole time I'm watching THE OFFICE. I don't think I can watch THE OFFICE with anyone else, because I'll look like a freak. I laugh at everything -.- Especially when they just randomly zoom in on the people's faces...when Michael Scott talks and doesn't make any sense at all....Kevin Malone...Jim&Dwight...Dwight in general....I JUST LOVE THIS SHOW.
After March 28, however, I will become addicted to The Secret Life of an American Teenager. To be honest, this show's pretty lame. Everyone's having sex and getting pregnant! In my opinion, that's not a very good depiction of highschool life. I'm only in it for Ricky&Amy. Ben is a definite NO. Grace is somewhat getting on my nerves, she's getting dirty. Amy's friends...omg don't even get me started -___-
I GOTTA STUDY STUDY STUDY STUDY STUDY juice.

Now it's just too late, and we can't go back. I'm sorry I can't be perfect.

2011-03-14T15:34:00.000-07:00

Day 17- What do you want to be when you get older?

I honestly don't know. Like that quote I posted not too long ago, "My life has no purpose, no direction, no aim, no meaning, and yet I’m happy. I can’t figure it out. What am I doing right?" I'm not passionate about anything and I don't particularly hate or love doing anything. I'm afraid that I'll make the wrong choice and get myself stuck in some lame job that I'll regret for the rest of my life. Maybe that's what's stopping me from picking a future career. The fear of making the wrong decision. The medical field is playing it safe. I won't get MY COUSIN JUST SENT ME THE MOST HILARIOUS PICTURE LOLOLOLOL YOU AIN'T F-ING WITH MY DOUGIE. Okay, I digress. Becoming a doctor or a nurse or anything that involves the plain old hospital bores me. There's no risk. it's not exciting at all. But I definitely won't do something daring like becoming an artist, because I'm not even good! I have trouble drawing from my imagination, because my want for perfection gets in the way. Nothing's ever good enough.
I have this dream fantasy job that I told jess about, it's pretty amazing. Picture this: A bakery. Pretty modern, but not too modern. The way I'm picturing it in my mind...it's kinda like...not too modern like Pink Berry...not like Corner Bakery...no not Jamba Juice....iono dawg, something light and homey. like maybe one wall is just brick, and the floor's wood and the rest of the walls are a warm white/cream color. And the tables would be a nice wood and whatnot, iono. ANYWAYS, I'm gonna bake yummy foods for people to eat and I'll talk to them and whatnot. I'll listen to their stories, because I love listening to people's stories. And I'll have amazing art work on the walls for sell, from upcoming famous artists...and i'll have a little arcade in the back with old fashioned arcade games :3 I'd sell lollicakes, cookies, mini pies, big pies, tarts, bread, donuts, muffins, cupcakes, MMMMMM. And I'll name them all wacky names! LOL like...YouAin'tF-ingWithMyDonut (LOL THAT PICTURE'S STILL IN MY MIND.) CraaAAaaAaAaAAAAzy Cupcakes. Minasauruspies! idk lol. Then maybe the occasional lunch special and whatnot. It sounds amazing. Then I'd be able to play amazing music in the bakery and meet amazing people. Maybe I'll make friends with the milkman, who knows? And if there are homeless people around, I'll sneak them a little somethin something ;) ;) I'll have a jar full of lollipops for kids. And I'll have a huuuuge bookshelf with books that I'll enjoy watching people read. My dream bakery will just be the ultimate hang out place :D TWAS A DREAM.

LIKE THIS! YOU SEE THE COLOR SCHEME? AND THE BRICK WALL? AND THE WOOD FLOORING? I KNOW THIS IS NOT A BAKERY, BUT YOU GET THE JIST.

Let's get outta here bro.

2011-03-13T15:23:00.000-07:00

I really want to watch a "One Hit Wonder Countdown", even though I've watched it three times before. I like all things eighties. I wish I was born in the early sixties or late fifties, then have the most perfect childhood with biking around with my friends, candy costing only a nickel, pretty little dresses, just everything. I was watching My Girl yesterday (I LOVE THAT MOVIE) and it just made me want it even more. Then I'd have my teenage years in the seventies, like That's 70s Show. Hilarious. Then I'll be independent and young in the eighties, partying like no one's business. Then I'll chill out in the nineties, and just watch technology go crazy for the rest of my life. I'd tell all my grandchildren about the good ol' times and they would ignore me to play with their iPods and watch TV. OH HOW I WISH.

Day 16- If the world were to end tomorrow, what would you do with your remaining time on earth?

I find this question so vague. Like how is the world going to end? Is it going to blow up? Freeze up? Are the animals going to go crazy? Plants? Or are the people in general going to crazy? Will the food run out? Will the water dry up? Will...iono. Oh, and am I the only one that knows? Or does everyone know? Because if everyone knows, then there will be complete chaos, and I wouldn't know what I'd do. If I was the only one....would I tell everyone else? I don't think anyone will believe me. If I tried telling other people, I'll spend my last day with a huge headache from getting so frustrated. So, I'll probably spend my last day making everyone happy. Like I'd spend all my money to buy things that everyone wants. I wouldn't spend it on myself because I know that the thing I'll buy will be useless to me. I think I'd want to go to the beach. Someplace away from the city. So I can see the stars without the smog and whatnot blocking it all. I've never seen a full on night sky. I'd go crazy with candy. Maybe some boba. Maybe some parfaits. Iono, whatevs I feel like. I would do so much stuff to preoccupy my mind.

BuddhaBob and I...

2011-03-12T15:24:00.000-08:00

Day 15- A photo of someone you fancy at the moment

WELL...I'LL LEAVE IT TO YOUR IMAGINATION.
HE'S A LITTLE OF THIS

A LOT OF THIS

THIS IS TOTALLY HIM

HE LOVES THIS

HE TAUGHT ME THIS

HE OWES THIS GUY TWENTY DOLLARS

HE'S A TOTAL.....

BUT HE'S THE..

MINUS THE "BUY"
OR MAYBE,
JUST REPLACE THE B IN BUY WITH A G.

no one can make sense to me

2011-03-11T13:18:00.000-08:00

Day 14- Provide Pictures of 5 Celebrity Crushes

EASY. ALL I NEED IS JUST ONE PICTURE.

BAM.

LOLOLOLOLOL I'M KIDDING.
HERE ARE MY REAL CELEBRITY CRUSHES. IN NO REAL ORDER.
WELL ACTUALLY, TOP'S NUMBER ONE AND ALL THE OTHER ONE'S ARE FIGHTING FOR SECOND PLACE.

G-Dragon & TOP

James Franco

Wu Chun

Adam Levine

THAT IS ALL.

take a breath, reflect what we've been through

2011-03-11T12:13:00.000-08:00

Day 13- Three Confessions Of Your Choice

1. I have this vivid memory of a handicap man struggling to get by. His wheelchair was stuck going uphill, and although I was in the car passing by, I wanted so much to get out and help him. Even though it happened when I was young, I still feel sad thinking about it. In my childhood imagination, I would've yelled to my stepdad, "STOP THE CAR!" with so much authority that my stepdad wouldn't really have a choice but to stop. And I'd open the door, get out, and walk to the handicap man. His hair was long and curly, he wore a beige button up shirt, jeans, and worn out brown dress shoes. I would help unlock his wheels, and I'd push him to wherever he wanted to go. I'd talk to to him, and listen to his life story and I'd learn about how life really is. We'd become best friends, and he'd be like the big brother that I've always wanted. I'd visit him and help him out whenever I could. We'd become life long friends. Ever since I read House On Mango Street, I've always wanted to get a huge house. I'd get a huge house and let homeless people live in all my extra rooms. I'd cook for them, play games with them, and I'd help them get their lives back. I think it'd be really fun.

2. No one has ever really asked about my father, except for Kathleen. I've always waited for someone to ask, but even when Kathleen asked, I didn't tell her. It feels as if I'm never going to completely confide myself in anyone, because as soon as I feel comfortable enough to, we drift away. I always find a reason to not open up. I've told some people some parts, but I never tell them everything. I've broken down before, because I was pressured and desperate, but in the end, I regret it so much. You laughed and you criticized and you ignored. You'll never know how much you hurt me. Telling you was one of my biggest mistakes. But you still mean a lot to me.

3. I wish that things were back to how they were, but I also don't want to lose the things that are special to me today. I'm selfish to even try to get what I want.

YESTERDAY WAS REALLY FUN. MOSTLY BECAUSE I'VE BEEN GROUNDED FOR THE PAST MONTH. SUZY'S CRAZY. SUZY'S BEAUTIFUL. KATHLEEN'S BEAUTIFUL. MELANIE'S BEAUTIFUL. CANDACE IS DEFINITELY BEAUTIFUL. EVERYONE'S SO GREAT. WHAT MELANIE TOLD ME MADE ME REALLY HAPPY. BEING ABLE TO LOOK AT ALL THE GIRLS AT EYE LEVEL WAS AN EXPERIENCE. I WANTED TO WEAR MY CONVERSE. THAT FOOD WAS GOOD. EVERYTHING JACK DOES MAKES ME LAUGH. JASON LOOKED SHARP, JORDAN TOO. JEROM'S HILARIOUS. I WAS REALLY HAPPY THAT JONEL CAME TO ME AFTERSCHOOL. IT'S SILLY, BUT IT MEANT A LOT TO ME THAT HE ASKED ME TO BUY HIS POSTER BOARD. EVEN THOUGH IT'S ONLY BECAUSE WE LIVE NEAR EACH OTHER...BUT STILL JONEL AND I SHOULD HAVE THAT NEIGHBORLY BOND THAT ALL YOU GUYS HAVE OVER THERE IN TERRA VISTA. JESS ATE A TREE. I MISS AARON. I MISS ANOOP. DEONDRE'S ON THE MENU. WALTER HAS FUNNY FACE EXPRESSIONS. HE DOES THE FLOWER POSE. HENRIK TOLD ME THAT THERE'S BACON IN FILET MIGNON, WHICH I HADN'T NOTICED BEFORE. I HAD FUN :)

but that's cool.

2011-03-09T16:48:00.000-08:00

Day 12- Screenshot Your Desktop.

pretty legit, eh?

blahblahblahblahblah

2011-03-08T20:49:00.000-08:00

Day 11- What is your favorite quote?

IOOONOOOOOOO. Maybe something by Lewis Caroll... bleh. I'm the type who comes across quotes and sympathizes with it. But my mind's drawing a blank >.< BLEH IONO, SKIP.

LOLOLOLOL I OPTED TO LOOKING UP THE OFFICE QUOTES. I'M READING AND WATCHING HILARIOUSNESS. x)
i'm just gonna put these here....

Dwight Schrute: Welcome to the Hotel Hell. Check-in time in now, check-out time is never.
Jim Halpert: Does my room have cable?
Dwight Schrute: No. And the sheets are made of fire.
Jim Halpert: Can I change rooms?
Dwight Schrute: Sorry we're all booked up. Hell convention in town.
Jim Halpert: Can I have a late check-out?
Dwight Schrute: I'll have to talk to the manager.
Jim Halpert: You're not the manager, even in your own fantasy?
Dwight Schrute: I'm the owner.. the co-owner. With Satan!
Jim Halpert: Okay, just so I understand it. In your wildest fantasy, you are in hell and you are co-running a bed and breakfast with the devil.
Dwight Schrute: But I haven't told you my salary yet.
Jim Halpert: Go.
Dwight Schrute: Eighty thousand dollars.

Toby: Actually, I didn't think it was appropriate to invite children since it's, uh, you know. There's gambling and alcohol... And it's in our dangerous warehouse. And it's a school night. And, you know, Hooters is catering. You know. Is that- is that enough? Should I keep going?
Michael Scott: Why are you the way that you are? Honestly, every time I try to do something fun or exciting, you make it not that way. I hate so much about the things that you choose to be.

Pam Beesly: There is a master key and a spare key for the office. Dwight has them both. When I asked, "what if you die, Dwight? How will we get into the office?" He said, "if I'm dead, you guys have been dead for weeks."

Kevin Malone: What don't you understand about the word approved? It seems that a couple of you don't know what the word approved means. [cut to talking head] I have zero tolerance for stupidity.

OMG I'M DYING.

daichi.

2011-03-07T20:59:00.000-08:00

Day 10- If you could only live off of one food and one beverage for the rest of your days, what would it be?

Hmmmm....this one's a toughie. I'd have to say fruity snacks, jelly beans, or anything with assorted flavors. So then I'll have a variety of different flavors to choose from. Beverage? Probably just water. I can't really think of anything that I'll be able to stand drinking for the rest of my life. :P Maybe soda chanh, but that's a maybe.

Give me heart and give me soul.

2011-03-06T16:02:00.000-08:00

Today, I learned about myself through inspiration and discovery. Well obviously through discovery lol. I just wanted that word in my sentence, because it felt like it should be in that sentence. I have no idea why I'm pointing that out now. It would've have gone unnoticed by you, huh? If not, then there's a valid reason for my nonsense. I don't know why I just said "valid". I'm crazy. I DIGRESS.

Today, I visited my ama and gong-gong. I told ama that I'll be there at two, but I ended up arriving at 12:50 -.- She was at the market, so I just watched this insane violin player on tv with my gong-gong. I played with peanut for a bit too. Then ama came home, and the first thing she did was give me my hang-bao (I don't know if I spelled that right.) which is money for chinese new year. She gave me pictures from when she took me to the beach a couple years ago, then she went to cook.

I went into my aunt Hoa's room. I used to spent A LOT of time in her room. The familiar smell of lavender, dust, and old library books hit me right when I opened the door to her room. I walked around, reminiscing in my mind. Then I opened her closet and found her lacrosse sticks. They're pretty legit. They're made out of wood, and the hole is more hallow compared to the ones we have at school. Must be intense to play with those. Then I opened the boxes that held all of her books. I planned on taking some home, like I did last year and the year before that, but then I saw a huge stack of papers. It was all of her high school essays. Apparently, MLA format was used back then as well. Jane Schaffer too. Crazy stuff.I read through them all, and I got to see what an amazing writer my aunt is. She wrote an essay titled, "The Four Factors That Affect the Expression of Pain." It was incredibly touching, and it gave me insight into my aunt's mind. I would type it out for you to read, but that's too much. If you ever want to read it, just let me know, I'll be more than happy to show it to you. Her essays weren't dry or bland. She had a way of making them interesting by connecting them to her life and to others'. It was amazing.

The last essay in the stack was about me. She had diagnosed me with the psychoanalytic theories of Klein and Winnicott. I'll admit, it was somehow difficult to read. It felt as if she knew me more than I knew myself, and it somewhat bothered me. It's amazing nevertheless. She correctly described my personality today with an analysis of my childhood behavior. I was only two when she wrote it, that's what so amazing. She wrote,

"According to Klein, Megen may be moving from paranoid-schizoid position to the depressive position, that is moving from experiencing others as split into good and bad, to experiencing others as both good and bad. Depressive anxiety is created when her inherent destructiveness generates a sense of dread that her rage will harm the good objects whom she loves and depends on. Eventually Megen gives in to me, because of her depressive anxiety, tremendous sense of guilt and remorse. She also fears abandonment, because every time she disobeys me I physically move her away from me...she is secured in her belief that her love can survive her destructiveness."

Till this day, this still holds truth to how I act. 100% It explains how I can't view people as totally bad. No matter what, I always see a bit of good in everyone. I will never turn on my friends for their faults and mistakes, even if I'm being taken advantage of. Whenever I think I'm treating someone else wrongly, I feel a "tremendous sense of guilt and remorse" and I give in. I never go through with my feelings of frustration and annoyance, because to me, hurting others isn't worth it. I'd rather hurt myself, because then it's guaranteed that the pain will go away without any regrets and I'll move on. If you were to turn your back on me and hurt me, I'd forgive you. Because I'll always remember the time you were there for me. I'll always remember your smile, your laugh, your advice, your help, and I'll forgive you nevertheless. I believe that everyone has a reason for the things they do, no matter how dumb. If all this makes me seem naive, then so be it. This way of thinking helps me live life happily.

I've never had anyone teach me something about myself like my aunt Hoa just did today. I've also never opened up this much on my blog. I'm enlightened, inspired, and amazed. Today's a good day. I'm happy.

Plainly plain, samely same

2011-03-06T10:38:00.000-08:00

Day 9- Pet Peeves

-when people put plastic utensils in the sink -________-
-Suite Life on Deck.
-Teen Mom
-How people on those dating reality shows, break up once the show goes off air.
-when people drive all fast, and stomp on the brake last minute.
-people who brake every minute.
-people who use speaker phones in a public area, when obviously no one's interested in their conversation.
-when ice cream gets all crazy and drips at the most randomest places
-when I get psyched up to watch a movie and open the case, to find that the DVD ain't even in there
-opening those insanely thick plastic coverings and cutting up your finger. Especially when you're excited to open it, and the wrap just prolongs your hype.
-when you're eating candy and someone asks if they can have a red one. LOLOLOLOL I'M KIDDING. Whenever people ask me for a red, I give them that look, and see what they do. On the inside, I'm laughing.
-when tv cuts off your favorite scene from a movie in order to "fit"
-When you find a really cute piece of clothing on the rack and they have like twenty in size XS, two in size 3X, and not a single one in your size.
-People who write "Keep in touch!" in your yearbook but never talk to you again.
-When you adjust the volume of the TV and the volume display blocks the subtitles during an important dialogue.
-When you have an itch on the bottom of your foot and you can't scratch it because you have shoes on.
-When someone leaves their phone number at the end of a long message and they say it so fast you can't understand it and have to listen multiple times to figure it out.
-When you pull a string hanging from your shirt and it doesn't break, but only becomes longer.
-When people don't clear the microwave numbers.
-Mumbling, then annoyedly saying "Forget it!" when people don't hear you.
-When you have to walk out of the shower naked because you forgot to bring a towel with you.
-People who leave farts in elevators that I subsequently enter. Then the next person thinks it's me.
-When other people sleep on my pillow.
-People who can't wait to file a lawsuit in order to get rich quick.
-Walking into spider webs.
-People who love to point out how wrong everyone else is while they are a walking train wreck
-Dried toothpaste in the sink.
-When people don't rinse their dishes before they put them in the sink.
-Having to explain the same thing more than once.

http://www.getannoyed.com/
^makes me laugh so much x)

even if it leads nowhere

2011-03-05T09:59:00.000-08:00

Day 8- Three Things I Want To Say To Different People

-I wish that the only reason you would call me for wasn't to help you gamble.

-I've made a list of all the things I find important to live a happy life. I'll try to teach them all to you.

-I've made myself change because I thought it'd be better for us, but I was wrong.

sigh, I really hate the prompt for today. I have things I want to say to different people, but to me, posting them on here will only make me feel worse. "If I tell the world, I'll never say enough, because it was not said to you."